


I Didn't Deserve This

by Noctua_Adagio



Category: Miraculous Ladybug
Genre: F/M, Guilt, Heavy Angst, Kidnapping, Self-Harm, Underage for American limits, trigger warning
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-06-03
Updated: 2017-07-12
Packaged: 2018-07-12 00:40:10
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Rape/Non-Con, Underage
Chapters: 11
Words: 24,942
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7077364
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Noctua_Adagio/pseuds/Noctua_Adagio





	1. The Pain

Marinette never asked for much. She never asked for the newest toys, the prettiest clothes or the best technology. Her Christmas list was never longer than six items, and she never threw tantrums when denied something. She was kind to as many people as she could, volunteering with soup kitchens and animal shelters since she was ten. She did everything in her power to do the right thing.

So why was she tied up in the back of a man’s van?

When she woke up, she came to realize that she wasn’t at home, and couldn’t move. She couldn’t open her mouth, and looked up to see a small circular window in the corner. Light shined through it, with the occasional shadow or tree in view. She was being moved. She wiggled around, trying to sit up, only to bump into something. It was a soft edge, and she squirmed onto it to feel a damp cloth like object. Bedsheets. Someone lived in this van. The light shined through the window again, and she saw the mattress. Stained with a creamy brown color. She looked down at her tied up legs, to see the same color running down them. The light poured through again, as the van came to an abrupt stop, and her body tumbled to the door. She shut her eyes as she felt the van rock a bit, and heard a voice outside. The door opened, bright light flooding in, and her face lightly scrunched.

“Time to wake up, sleeping beauty.” A man spoke, his voice gentle and suave. Marinette kept her eyes shut, as he got closer casting a shadow over her face. He felt his hand on her hip, and his face hovered just inches from hers. “If you don’t wake up, it won’t be fun for you.” He cooed in her ear, but she faked a light snore. He sighed, and moved away, his heels digging into the gravel making a nauseating crunch. She opened one eye, and looked at the man. Clearly taller than her, with red highlighted hair and a forearm tattoo. She couldn’t make out what the tattoo was of, as she shut her eyes again at the sound of him moving. She felt a cool piece of metal run along her thighs, before the tight constraints around her knees and ankles was released. She was lifted over the man's shoulder, and she got a quick look at her surroundings. Abandoned parked cars, and a warehouse. Nothing familiar. Her eyes shut again, as she was placed back down, her body resting on the wet spot on the mattress. Her legs were spread, and she felt cool air against her intimate parts. Where were her panties? Suddenly the panic filled her. Where was she? Where was Tikki? Who was this man? What was going to happen to her?

The last question was the only one answered as she felt the hard piece of skin push into her dry folds, and her eyes shot open.

“Glad you’re awake. I wouldn’t want you to miss round two.” The man smiled, his face a blur, as he pulled mostly out before slamming back in at full force. She screamed as he tore her, her voice going hoarse as she felt the blood drip out of her, and heard his light groaning.

* * *

 

Marinette had been missing for three weeks. Her parent’s cheerful bright faces were no longer there, being replaced by a desolate paleness that everyone felt. Adrien was the first to find out, even before Alya. He was there that day.

“I’m sure she’ll be back in a few minutes.” Sabine smiled at him, but in her eyes she was clearly panicked at her daughter's disappearance. Marinette hadn’t answered their calls for hours, and after the sun began to set they all went out to search for their child. When only a shoe turned up, they all understood that she was gone. The police were immediately called, Adrien disappearing after being interrogated only to return as Chat Noir. The dark look in his eyes as he searched every possible location, the only conclusion being that she was no longer in Paris. She was gone, another statistic in the most lustful city in the world.

The three weeks zoomed by, and the police began to look for a body. No one dared belittle Marinette’s name, not even Chloe. If anyone did, they faced Adrien. He was destroyed, with every second she wasn’t there he felt worse and worse. Like he had failed her. He couldn’t find Ladybug and he couldn’t find his friend. He couldn’t find anything he cared about, falling into depression for the first time since he started public school.

 

Marinette on the other hand suffered the worst fate imaginable. Every second her aggressor was in the room, she wished she was dead. He was an insatiable sadist, and it was clear by the marks on her skin. The burns, the cuts, the bruises and bites. She had long since stopped begging to be let go, her voice only being used to scream. There were times where he wouldn’t even pleasure himself to her. He’d simply get his knife, cutting a chunk of her skin off and frying it in front of her. She was forced to watch him eat her, making such remarks as, “The half Chinese girl needs soy sauce.”

She didn’t dare speak to him. She couldn’t muster up the courage to sass him. She simply sat there and watched him tear her apart. Her throat was sore, her mouth dry, and her stomach tender for all the times she had thrown up his seed. He didn’t like that. “Eat it you pig.” He’d order, and she would lick up the diluted stomach acid off of the floor. She lived in a cage of her own filth, and he laughed as she scrambled for the scraps he’d feed her. She was nothing more than his pet. He wouldn’t clean her, simply spraying her cage with a power hose each week. She resolved to use the bathroom once a day to minimize the stench, not even being provided with a bucket. It never worked though. She always went while he defiled her. The pressure would become too much, and he would care too little, her blood often becoming mixed with her feces and urine. He had her clean that up too. There was nothing she could do to escape, and after the first month she gave up. She didn’t scream. She didn’t cry. She didn’t bite. She just laid there and took it. Her collapsing body had nothing more to offer to her spirit, and her spirit had nothing left to offer the world.

As time passed, she learned what his name was. Felipe. Or at least it was close to that. She could barely read it off the receipt she had found on the floor. It didn't matter anyway. His red hair gradually turned to blonde, and she realized it was the dye growing out. He kept himself neat, the only deviant about him being the tattoo on his arm. It was a logo. In the dim light, she couldn't make out what for. He smiled at her so kindly, as he dripped hot wax onto her bare breasts. She looked disinterested, and he set the candle down.

 

“Do I not satisfy you, Marinette?” He looked genuinely disappointed. “Am I too vanilla for you?” She said nothing, provoking him to slap her. “Ungrateful bitch.” He spat, walking away. She didn't see him for three days after and her stomach protested. When he did come, it was to spray her cage, and nothing more. The last time she saw him, it was to drop a bag of dog food next to her cage. “It's not open. Good luck.” That was the last thing he said to her before he was gone. He didn't clean her cage anymore. She wallowed in her filth, eating the dog food whenever she felt any pain. She became thirsty quickly, resorting to drinking the water that dripped from the ceiling when it rained, and even her own urine if necessary. She measured the passage of time by the mess in her cage and the length of her hair. It was past her shoulders at this point. In the distance, she heard Felipe's voice and another woman's screaming. She missed him, though it pained her to admit. Then one day it stopped. There was no sound but her own blabbering to herself. She picked at her skin, desperate to feel something besides her own loneliness. It was nothing compared to what she used to feel. It was nothing to her. She was completely numb.

* * *

 

After a year, Adrien had nearly forgotten about Marinette. No one spoke of her, Alya sat in the back of the class, new students filling the empty seats. Life had moved on. But Chat didn't. Adrien desperately searched every night for Ladybug, seeing nothing. To his surprise, he hadn't seen a single Akuma. Hawkmoth must've forgotten as well. More than anything, he searched for her earrings. Just the simple miraculous would bring him closure. He came up with nothing, and for his sixteenth birthday he went into his father's office.

“Hello, father.” Adrien spoke calmly gaining his father's attention.

“Happy Birthday Adrien. Are you here for a reason?” His father glanced up from his computer screen.

“Yes, father. I’d like to have a party to celebrate this year.” He explained. Over the year Adrien had matured, coming into his own and for lack of a better term making puberty his bitch. His father sighed, tapping at the computer again.

“You're a young man and I will not argue with you. Do what you believe is best. Have your party. But I will not throw it for you.” His father's words were music to Adrien's ears.

“Thank you father.” He practically ran out of the room, dialing Nino on the way out. They had been planning the party for weeks, and even had the perfect place to set it up. It was an abandoned Agreste ware factory, just a mile or so out of Paris. Adrien picked up Nino, and headed over with all of the supplies in the trunk. The gorilla still drove him around, allowing them to simply chat in the back seat. They pulled into the parking lot of the factory, parking the car. There were recent tire marks, and the gorilla took notice. No more than two months ago, not too recent, but it still caused concern. He got out with the two boys, being the first to enter. The gorilla went to the power switch, turning on the breaker and the lights flickered on. The area was large but clear, the perfect place for the little rave they planned. Nino eagerly began to clean up a bit, before spotting a stain on the floor. It trailed towards a door at the very back of the factory.

“Dude, check this out.” Nino called Adrien over, and gestured to the trail. Adrien paled, realizing immediately that it was blood. He cautiously followed the stains, staring at the ground for any sign of a weapon. All he could see was candles and rope. He stood in front of the door, jiggling the handle. To his disappointment and relief, it was locked. He pressed his ear to the door as a precaution. There was a rustling sound on the other side, sounding like plastic. He stared at his bodyguard who came to the door and in one swift motion kicked it down, fully prepared to attack whatever was in there. To the surprise of the three boys, there was the spilled bag of dog food, and a girl who laid in a cage. The room reeked of her waste, and she looked up to see who had intruded. Her blue eyes which once carried the depth of the ocean, a clear summer night sky's grace, we're now dim and shallow. Her skin was filthy, some of her cuts being long infected, others still freshly bleeding. Adrien paled at the sight, and Nino vomited. The room was covered in the same stain on the concrete outside. Dried old blood. In the corner of the room was a mattress, crusted from its use without wash, and it seemed as if it could be home to bed bugs. Adrien stared at his bodyguard, not sure what to tell him to do. When his words finally came to, he choked on them only brief utterances of those words escaping.

“Out. Marinette… Let her.” Tears pricked at his eyes, and the gorilla snapped the rusted lock with ease. She crawled out of the cage, her body collapsing on the cold concrete. Not a sound came to her lips, as she reached for the spilled dog food. Her stomach growled loudly, and Adrien froze. This was Marinette. She had been here this whole time. If he had just went a bit further, he would've found her. He knew of this factory his whole life, yet he couldn't bring himself to consider coming here; here, the place that held her prisoner for over a year. Here, the place that took her from her loved ones. No, no, it wasn't here that took her. It was… it was him, whoever he was. He went to Marinette’s side, moving her hand from the food pellets. When he went to lift her, he noticed the clearly fractured bones in her body. He grimaced, not wanting to hurt her, but even as he asked if she was okay Marinette laid there lifeless. He gently wrapped her arms around his neck, lifting her up bridal style and carrying her out of the room. Nino was the one who called the cops, and Adrien stood there holding his friend as her labored breathing kept his heart beating out of its chest. She was so broken, and that broke him. But for all the anger and sadness he had in his heart, he was having a happy birthday. He had found Marinette. He found her just in time.

 

* * *

 

The hospital was hell. His father met him there, devastated at the discovery. Not because it was his factory but because of how much this girl meant to his son. That was made clear when he entered the waiting room, clearing out all waiting press with a simple flutter of his hands. Mr. Agreste gave Tom and Sabine the warmest look Adrien had ever seen his father have, and they sat there waiting for her to come out of the ICU. They didn't move, they didn't speak, they just stared at the door waiting for permission to see the missing girl. Fifteen hours passed, and Gabriel had left to get them coffee. Adrien finally broke his gaze to the chairs where Marinette’s parents sat, noting they were now accompanied by Alya. He said nothing when his father returned. He said nothing when the doctors came to let them in. None of them said a thing as they crowded around Marinette’s bed. Neither did she. She stared at them in silence, not moving, rarely blinking. When the nurse came in to feed her, she didn't touch her spoon. She stared above everyone's heads at the wall, and for the first time in seven months she felt herself cry. The tears ran down her face, hot and large, as if the only thing that had kept them in there for so long was the necessity for survival. But no matter how much she wanted to bawl, and scream and thrash, all she could do is stare above the heads of her loved ones and silently cry.


	2. Safety

Security stood posted in her room for the entirety of her first night. She was uncertain if they would remain for the second and third. There were three female guards, and two males. The men stood out in front, the women doing their best to engage Marinette in conversation. Marinette didn’t speak. It was understood, and the three women agreed they wouldn’t want to speak if they had been through the same thing. Halfway through the night, they turned on the television to a Disney movie, to take Marinette’s mind off of things. They took the time of when she fell asleep, marking it at three twenty-two, and switched shifts with three new female guards. The nurses on staff were wary of the armed security, but understood why they were there. Adrien wouldn’t leave her side, purely out of fear for her safety, causing his father to hire the security. It was the least he could do, and the security were more than eager to perform well for Mr. Agreste. So, when Marinette opened her eyes at six in the morning, they quickly dialed the Agreste mansion, leaving a message with Nathalie. Marinette had turned on the television to a celebrity gossip channel, not saying a word as she heard the news. _Jagged Stone was releasing a new album… Master Chef France was having a new season… Gabriel Agreste’s first born son had returned from his studies in China… New York fashion week is starting now and designers are flocking to the scene…_

She shut off the television, her mind a blur with the quick information. Too much too fast. She looked to the door, just in time to see a shift change. The nurse came in to check her, and she shrunk away at the touch. She didn’t want to be touched. As soon as the nurse left, she gestured that the guards give her a moment to herself, and they closed the curtain around her bed. As soon as she saw nothing but the foam green fabric, she began to sob lightly into her hands, digging her nails into her skin only to realize that they had been clipped. Her head spun, and without thinking she bit her arm. Hard. She drew blood, and as soon as she did it her heart monitor screeched. The curtain was tore open by nurses and security alike, to see a crying Marinette picking at her new wound, desperately trying to claw the damaged skin off.

Her new home would be the Psych ward, until she demonstrated signs of improvement. She didn’t speak when they moved her, she didn’t protest when they sedated her, she stared above all their heads.

She remained in the psych ward for the next five months. She was visited nearly every day by her parents, and her friends. Adrien and Alya came together, trying to engage her in conversation. The most she did was crinkle her nose at a bad pun. Adrien considered that progress. When Adrien came alone, she responded more, staring at his forehead instead of above him. He smiled at that, occasionally making her little origami cranes and placing them on top of her open palm. The week before she was released, she finally closed her hand around it, accepting his gift. Three days before, she looked him in his eyes and smiled. The day of, she said her first word in almost a year.

“Snow.” It was clear as a bell, and everyone at the table turned their heads to where she was looking.

“Yes, Mari! It’s snowing! It’s almost Christmas!” Her mother cried, a smile plastered on her face.

“I want to go out and play in the snow. With Alya.” Marinette spoke again after five minutes. Her mother nodded, and called over one of the doctors.

“She’s speaking again!” She whispered, dragging the man over.

“Oh? Show me.” The doctor sat at the end of the table, waiting in silence for a few moments before Marinette spoke again.

“Mama,” she started, peeling her gaze off of the gated window. “Mama, I want to go home.” Her eye contact remained strong, and the tears pricked at the corner of her eyes.

“Marinette!” She mother cried out, as the tears streamed down her cheeks. “You can come home very soon! We promise! We all promise you that.” Her mother went to her daughter, hugging her tightly. Marinette did not return the gesture, but for the first time in over a year, she didn’t cave in at physical contact.

 

The next day, Marinette was released. Her mother brought her warm clothes to wear, and they stepped out into the cool embrace of early December. Thirteen days until Christmas, and the avenue was bustling with shoppers. Marinette kept her head down, and her mother kept her close. The noise of the bustling street made her head spin, each new voice seeming to only speak about her, only be mocking her. She was on the verge of a panic attack by the time they had reached the bakery. Sighing in relief, she entered the building and took in the welcoming aroma of fresh bread and cinnamon. She nearly cried at the warmth and love radiating from her home, as the familiarity stuck out to her like a sore thumb. Deep down, she felt like she didn’t belong there. Her mother gestured for her to follow, beckoning for Marinette to go through the back door and up the stairs. She shifted uneasily, before taking her mother’s hand and heading up the steps. Her mother knocked at the door when they got in front of the living room, Marinette heard the shifting from inside. There was probably a welcome home party for her. She wasn’t looking forward to that. As the door opened, she was greeted with the warm smell of bourguignon on the stove and the faces of those who cared about her. Adrien stood by the couch with Nino, Alya sat at the counter with her father, and by the window was Jagged Stone for some odd reason. When she stepped in, they didn’t fall silent, they simply nodded at her. Marinette understood why, the silence would’ve been too much for her to handle. Adrien stepped away from Nino, to formally greet Marinette, getting to her before Alya did.

“I’m glad you’re okay, Marinette. You don’t understand how happy I am, and proud of you I am. You’re so strong, and I’m sure Ladybug would be proud too.” He explained, handing her a box. She took it from him, glancing at the green and black wrapping paper.

“Thank you, Adrien. And another thank you for saving me. I’d like to be alone for a moment.” She managed to get out as she walked towards the stairs to her room. She smiled at Alya, as if to express that she would be returning, and climbed the stairs to her room. The mention of Ladybug reminded her of the most important question she could fathom. Where’s Tikki? Scouring her room, she nearly turned it upside down looking for the earrings, only to conclude that that _monster_ of a person had taken them. Her face felt hot and the room spun. How did Paris handle the akuma’s without her? How many had there been? She turned on her heels walking to the pillow on her chaise, and gazing at the gift she had carelessly tossed there. The simple black wrapping paper and green ribbon almost reminded her of Chat. How had he held up during these rough days? What had he done without her? Gingerly tugging on the ribbon, she elected to set it to the side, and possibly put it in her hair later. A piece of her friend for strength. But as she opened the wrapping paper, nausea washed over her. It was the box she had received the earrings in, but much more warn. The wood looked heavily used, as if it had been passed along much more. Inside were none other than the very earrings she scoured the room for moments ago, and a note that simply said “Your secret is safe with me. Stay strong.”

Adrien knows. Adrien figured it out. Adrien found the earrings, god known how long ago, and kept them safe for her. Adrien saved her once again, and she eagerly put the earrings on, her ears bleeding slightly as she re-pierced her ears. As soon as they were on, a wave of relief washed over her, as her spotted Kwami appeared.

“Marinette, you’re alright!” The bug patterned creature cried out, as tears pricked at her eyes.

“Tikki, I was so worried! I thought I had lost you forever!” Marinette didn’t hold back as she sobbed. The kwami nuzzled her chosen, sighing as she did.

“You’re telling me. I tried to protect you as best as I could, but in the end all I could do was keep your earrings safe. I went against so many rules and over exerted myself so much. But I brought them to safety.” She explained, and Marinette’s eyes widened.

“Tikki, what did you do?” Marinette’s stomach turned again, but the kwami simple stared off.

“I put myself in Adrien’s path, along with the earrings. I was hoping he could find you sooner, trying my hardest to put it in his head to bring he as he held my item, but I’m weak without a chosen. It took too long, I’m sorry.” She explained, before floating directly in front of Marinette’s face. “He was looking for you. Both you you, and Ladybug you. And after seeing he was holding the same color earrings you always wore, he put it together.” Tikki sighed, staring at her hands.

“I’m weaker because of what I’ve done, but your safety will make me stronger. It will make us stronger. And I know for a fact, Adrien will never tell a soul.” The kwami stared off, as if remembering past chosens. Marinette knew the look all too well, and cupped her little friend in her hands.

“I trust that, Tikki. Thank you. Now, come, let’s go eat.” She gave her best smile, slipping the kwami into her pocket and heading back down stairs.

With her earrings back on, her confidence had returned enough for her to talk with everyone who came to support her. Jagged offered to write a song for her, but Marinette politely declined. Alya droned on about Ladybug’s mysterious disappearance, and that Chat Noir had been fighting alone, keeping the akuma in a jar or something. Adrien spoke about his brother finally coming home after being away for years, and how excited he was that two of his favorite people were back in his life. More importantly, the warmth in the room kept her at ease, all of her loved ones smiling at her and acting as if nothing had happened. Not confronting the issue made it all the more easier, and Marinette stared out the window as the snow covered the city. The blanketed rooftops, and couples in the streets made her remember what she had so dearly missed. Love. A single tear ran down her face, and she wiped it away as quickly as it appeared. The doorbell buzzed, and her mother rushed to get it.

In came none other than Gabriel Agreste, with a young man trailing behind him. Clean cut blonde hair with a grey dress-shirt and black slacks and vest. All Agreste brand.

“Felix! You’re here!” Adrien stood up from his spot on the couch, rushing to hug the man.

“Of course. I wish I was here sooner, so I could properly introduce myself to everyone, but I was caught up with my studies.” He stepped forward, his cloudy grey blue eyes setting Marinette on edge. She moved back, pressing herself against the wall, as he cut his way through the room to her spot by the window. Keeping a two foot distance he introduced himself.

“My name is Felix, and it is a _pleasure_ to _finally_ make your acquaintance, Marinette. I’ve heard many good things about you, you’re a _fine_ young woman. My condolences for what you’ve gone through, but I am nothing short of _amazed_ by your strength.” Felix extended his hand, and Marinette cautiously placed hers into his. He grazed her hand with his lips, a gentle kiss before looking her in the eyes, and squeezing. Hard. She quickly pulled her hand away, eyes wide as she took another step away, almost knocking over a lamp. He quickly moved to steady it, looking down at her with nothing short of contempt.

“My apologies for squeezing your hand, I have a mild nervous tick. I do hope we can be friends.” He nearly growled at her, and she meekly nodded.

“A pleasure to meet you, Felix.” She whispered, quickly excusing herself. She expressed to her mother that she was beginning to feel overwhelmed, and that she was going to lie down. The reassurance that her mother would handle everything downstairs was enough for the young girl to practically fly up the stairs and into her room.

That look. Those eyes, that grip. It was him, it must’ve been. How stupid she was to believe he wouldn’t find her. But what hurt her the most, was the thought of Adrien being related to that _scum._ That _lowlife dirtbag_ had the audacity to give Adrien, the most precious cinnamon roll, a hug. That _insatiable asswipe, scrotum faced, dick stain, waste of oxygen in human form_ had the _AUDACITY_ to step foot in her house. Her face burned, and the tears began to stream down her face. She couldn’t tell anyone, no one would believe her. She couldn’t tell anyone, what if she was wrong. She couldn’t tell anyone, she would only be sent back to the psych ward. She couldn’t tell anyone. That night, she wept for the loss of her safety, and for the first time ever, prayed she could become akumatized.

It didn’t come true.

* * *

 

She woke up the next morning to the sound of voices in the kitchen. Groaning, she rolled out of bed, before realizing she was still home. She jolted awake with new-found excitement, practically flying out of bed to get ready for the day. Her mother would be taking her shopping today, a tradition upheld every year. The second Saturday of every december was their shopping day, and they bought the clothes for the upcoming year while they were on sale. Each new outfit was a gift and a goal, something Marinette looked forward to. She slipped on the warmest clothes she could find in her drawers, but they almost fell off of her withering frame. She made a mental note to start eating more, and looked at her mirror. The scars on her neck were mildly raised, and she opted to swap out her long sleeved shirt for a turtle neck. She didn’t bother to apply any lip gloss, or place her hair in their signature pigtails, as she left her room. As soon as she saw the kitchen, she froze.

“Good morning, Marinette! Did you sleep well?” Her mother smiled, flipping over an omelette.

“I-I slept fine.” She got out after processing the situation. Sitting only a few feet away from her mother, was _him_. Felix.

“Wonderful! I’m so glad you’re doing well, but I have some bad news.” Her mother put the omelette in a plate, giving it to the creep who stared hungrily at Marinette.

“What is it?” She started down the stairs again, a lump forming in her throat a bit.

“I won’t be able to go shopping with you today. There’s a wedding tomorrow, and we need to get the cakes finished for it. I completely forgot.” Her mother cracked a few more eggs, preparing a meal for her daughter. Marinette on the other hand, suddenly lost her appetite. She was looking forward to spend the whole day with her mother, it would be the perfect distraction for what had happened. But when she looked to the side, the cheshire grin plastered on her tormentors face made everything clear.

“Is Felix taking me out of the house today?” She managed to get out, in barely a whisper.

“Oh, yes! That’s the other part. He offered to take you shopping today, as a welcome home gift.” Sabine smiled, placing the omelette on the table for Marinette. She grimaced, poking at it with her fork, and taking a small bite. She wasn’t too hungry after the news, but the thought of her clothes not fitting motivated her to swallow down the meal. After eating in silence, she sighed and looked up, faking a smile as best as she could.

“Thank you, Felix. I appreciate it.” She tilted her head to the side a bit, overdoing it for the sake of her mother. The older woman nodded at the two, before picking up their plates and doing the dishes.

“Oh, it’s nothing really. If you would kindly get ready to leave, there’s a car waiting for us downstairs.” He looked at his phone, and waved her off as if she was nothing but a nuisance, She stormed off, going upstairs to grab her coat, and the still asleep kwami. She slipped Tikki into her bag, and took her phone of the charger. Her notifications blew up the minute she turned it on, and it painfully reminded her how long she had been away. Silencing her phone, she went downstairs, to see a very impatient Felix.

“Are you ready?” He tried to sound sweet, almost as if mimicking his younger brother. Marinette nodded, hugging her mother before leaving. As soon as they left the building she turned to him and stomped on his foot, with all the force she could muster. He laughed, wrapping her hair around his hand, and tugging her to the car.

“Now, listen here you pitiful brat. You’re going to behave, or else back into the nut house with me, is that understood?” He opened the door, shoving her in the backseat and climbing in next to her. The driver was a lanky man, clearly not the usual Agreste muscle that drove the family around. “Raul, drive.” He commanded, and the car pulled off. She stared out the window, ignoring him as he traced patterns over her legs with his fingers. When she saw the familiar streets leading up to Champs-Élysées, her eyes widened. She had never stepped on the boulevard, more or less shopped there. The designed clothes in the windows filled her heart with joy. She glanced over to a smug looking Felix, and her heart sank. He was trying to buy her loyalty. Buy new toys for a pet. Was this a reward for her not telling? She shook the thoughts from her head as the driver pulled over, letting the two out. She stepped out, gazing at the avenue before noticing the developing crowd. It was then that she realized, any Agreste walking with a woman was big news. She pulled her scarf tight around her, and Felix smirked and began to parade her around, not missing an opportunity to speak. He spun a tale of how close his family was to hers because of his kind hearted younger brother. How seeing her, evoked his own kindness, and to get her spirits up after her tragic situation he agreed to take her shopping in place of her mother, essentially strengthening the family ties. Everyone ate it up, and Marinette grew frustrated her face getting hot and tears welling in her eyes. How dare he? How dare he cause the situation and act as if he only wants to help? The ground under her seemed to cave in, and her breathing became labored. Her knees trembled, and she fell to the side, only for him to catch her in his arms.

“It seems the crowd has set off another of her anxiety attacks. If you would kindly, no more questions.” He spoke and the crowd parted, allowing him to bring her into a store. She was given water, and told to breathe. When the world finally came back into focus, she saw him kneeling before her, his hands gripping her thighs as he stared at her. Even lower than her, the condescending look he gave her made her understand she was still beneath him. Staring at the clothes around her, she quickly became disgraced, her eyes honing in on a red and black dress. Long-sleeved, ankle length and ever so vintage looking. Felix's eyes followed her gaze and instantaneously a sales person appeared with three sizes for her to try on. Though she hated to admit it, shopping today would in fact be delightful.

And it was; once she got past his predator like gaze. The sales representatives were more than happy to help, and he insisted she didn't look at the price tag. She grimaced at his kindness, knowing very well it was a facade. Yet, she couldn't turn down his offer, even buying jewelry. It was to be a Christmas gift for her mother, but he insisted she get more than a sapphire necklace. He held up a pair of diamond encrusted Ruby earrings, and her face paled. She shook her head no, her hands immediately reaching to hold her earrings closer.

“Why not? You'd look lovely in them, and it'd be an upgrade from those drab things you're wearing now.” Felix reasoned and she searched for an explanation.

“Adrien got them for me. They used to have the ladybug design but it wore off in my sleep. Wearing them makes me feel strong.” she explained, and his eyes darkened. Jealousy? Anger? Frustration? He fumed. The emotions of a child were beyond his comprehension and his own emotions settled into a thin layer of disappointment, coating those feelings like grease over a cold turkey. How disgusting. He was honestly disgusted with himself, as he tossed the earrings to the side, the hooks scraping on the glass counter before skidding off. Marinette knew she had angered him, opting to pick out an ear cuff that wrapped all the way around her ear. It was cat snapped on the top, the tail twisting downward. Looking back to Felix, she noticed the look of approval, and nodded.

The last thing she wanted to do was give in, but if it meant her safety she accepted it. Once she arrived at home, she noticed how overboard she went. There were so many bags in her room, and Felix sat on her chaise laughing.

“What's so funny?” She snapped, and he stood up. She cowered and he only laughed again.

“Women, and their love for shopping.” He walked to the bags picking out a pair of cat stockings. “And your uncanny obsession with cats.” He flung the tights to her closet, and she realized what he meant. A lot of her purchases had been cat related, hues of black and green scattered amongst the bags. Deep down she knew it was because she missed her friend. But as long as Felix didn't know, her feelings about cats would remain as an obsession.

“They're just cute.” She shrugged his comment off, putting away her new clothes. Her fingers stopped at a leather jacket she had purchased, and she thought about her kitty once again. He must've missed her so much. She began to tear up when Felix interrupted her thoughts.

“You're a Chat Noir fan, aren't you? Are you wondering why he didn't save you? Why he didn't come to rescue you? You're worthless, just another statistic, you couldn't have expected him to try and find you.” His sly remark was supposed to destroy her, but instead she spun around with enough speed to make the paper in the bags move.

“You're wrong.” She growled, and he raised a brow.

“Excuse me.” He took a seat at her computer desk.

“You're wrong. Chat Noir cares about every injustice. Maybe he didn't find me, maybe he was up to his neck in work, but he cared. He knew something was wrong. He always knows. He didn't rescue me, but Adrien did and in my book it's the same thing. It's a hero, caring about me. So you can take your snide deprecating comments and shove them up your ass, because YOU'RE WRONG!” Her words shook him to the core. For someone to be so certain, so assertive in his presence, was unheard of. A moment passed, and she went back to putting her clothes away. He sat there with his thoughts, before standing up.

“You may be out of your cage, but you're not free. I'm no where near being done with you.” He began to leave when she spoke, her voice cracking as the words struck him.

“You may be walking around, hands clean of your crimes, but you're out of your mind if you think you're getting out of this unscathed. Someone will find out what you've done, and when they do.” She stood up, swiftly approaching him. “When they do, there will be nothing your name can do to hide you.” Her eyes were dark, and for a moment Felix was actually afraid. That was, until he began to laugh.

“I'm glad we're on the same page then.” He opened the trapdoor, leading into her kitchen. “Good night, Marinette. Sweet dreams.”

“Bite me.” She turned around, returning to her clothes, and he chuckled leaving her home for the night. The minute he was gone, she began to cry, unable to hold her fear back anymore.


	3. Move Forward

At his home, Felix was welcomed by the blissful silence that his father preferred. Walking up the stairs to the west wing, he found his old room. He spent his first night home in his father's office, slumped over the desk, and found a sense of nostalgia after finally entering his own room. It was just like he had left it when he was eighteen. It was just like before his mother disappeared.

 

Shaking the Miserable thoughts from his head, he gently shut the door behind him, and walked to his computer. Pulling a flashdrive from his pocket, he fumbled before properly inserting it. His computer whirred, the desktop being quite a few years old. When was the last time he got a new computer. Six years ago? Seven? Possibly even longer than that. He snapped out of his thoughts, realizing his computer screen wasn’t even on. Pressing the button on the dusty monitor, he heard the door knock.  

“Come in.” His voice echoed from the room, and he saw his familiar screensaver. His mother and him with a young Adrien. Shaking his mouse, he looked to the side to see his younger brother.

“Felix.” Adrien’s voice trembled mildly. “When did you say you returned to France?”

“Let’s see… I called father the week after I arrived, so that would be maybe… last year in February?” He said, searching his mostly empty call log.

“And where did you say you were staying?” Adriens voice began to fill with certainty.

“A girlfriend's home about a half hour away. Around Cergy.” He explained, and Adrien frowned.

“You’ve been in France almost a two and a half years, and only chose to come home now? What happened that you finally decided to come home?”

“We got into an argument, and she broke up with me. I came home. It’s simple.” He brushed it off as if it was nothing, but he feared the next words to exit Adrien’s mouth.

“I hear you spent the day with Marinette. How was that?” Adrien took a seat on his brother's bed, noticing the grin on Felix’s face.

“It was remarkable. I took her shopping and saw her in every outfit. There’s quite the body on that young lady.” He laughed, and Adrien shot up.

“You will NOT objectify Marinette!” He shouted, and his brother waved him off.

“ _You_ will not tell _me_ what ‘NOT’ to do. She has the perfect frame, and amazing hips. Her legs are so long. I can practically imagine them over my shoulders.” Felix smirked as his younger brothers face turned bright red. “And I’m sure you can too.”

“It doesn’t matter if I feel attraction to her, I’m not objectifying her. And you won’t either.” Adrien's voice cracked slightly, for the first time in two years. He was embarrassed, and he knew it would only get worse the longer they spoke.

“How are you any better than me? Telling me I cannot appreciate a females figure, because you think it’s wrong. Well I think it’s wrong for my younger brother to be fantasizing about that poor poor girl. Are you wishing that you were the one who defiled her?” Felix turned to fully face Adrien, only to meet his fist.

“How _DARE YOU_? You think I wanted to see her like that? I just wanted my friend back! But you… you’re a twisted man.” Adrien's face was bright red, and his face burned. Not with embarrassment, no far from that. It was from his struggle to contain his unbridled rage against his brother.

“How are I? How dare _you?_ Hitting your own brother over some common whore, and to think you have any self respect or pride.” Felix turned back to the computer, completely ignoring his fuming sibling.

“What did you just say?” Adrien growled, cracking his knuckles.

“I said. Your little crush is a whore.” Felix chuckled lightly to himself, opening a file on his flash drive.

“You’ll pay for that.” Adrien’s eyes welled up, his jaw clenched.

“Oh really? What makes you think that? I haven’t paid for anything else I’ve said or done. Marinette knows that best.” Felix blurted out snidely. A lump quickly formed in his throat, realizing he had said too much. Adrien stumbled back.

“What did you do to her?” Adrien stuttered, his hands fumbling around in his shirt pocket for Plagg. The kwami gave a reassuring, but hard squeeze of his chosens thumb.

“Oh, wouldn’t you like to know. Now, go to your room and get some rest. A growing _boy_ needs his rest. Don’t you want to become a _man_ like me?” Felix shooed his brother away, and Adrien kicked over a trash bin in frustration, some dust falling out.

“I never want to become a man like you.” Adrien spoke, heading to the door. “If I find out that you did _anything_ to harm Marinette… I’ll personally end you. No one, not even Ladybug herself, could save you from the hellfire I’d unleash on your existence. Goodnight, Felix.” Adrien opened the door.

“Goodnight, Adrien. Sleep well.” His brother smiled kindly. “I hope Marinette can sleep well too.” As soon as his brother shut the door, Felix chuckled darkly. “She needs her rest for tomorrow.”

Opening a final file on his laptop, he smirked at the images on his screen. An auction was to be in order, selling Marinette’s hell to the highest bidder, and Felix intended to make her know. To make her know that he owned her hell. To make her know that he could sell her safety for almost nothing if he so chose to. Ejecting the flashdrive, he left it atop his nightstand. It was pitiful for him to sleep in outside clothes, but that wasn’t his concern anymore. He crawled into bed, his thoughts racing of tomorrow's plans. Tomorrow, she would be his once again.

* * *

 

Marinette didn’t sleep well that night. She knew she wouldn’t. Spending so much time with Felix had given her so much to think about, her dreams being plagued with the thought of him. His body pressed against hers as she cried out in pain, his nails digging into her waist, his mouth digging into her shoulder, and her voice going hoarse. She couldn’t help it, it was too much for her to ever be able to handle. She woke up, with the fear of it happening again, staring out the skylight above her bed. Her parent’s called to her, but she couldn’t quite make out what they were saying. Was a friend over? Was breakfast ready? Her phone buzzed, falling to the side and off of her bed, but she didn’t hear a thump. All she knew was that there was a shoe print on her skylight, and that she could feel her heart beating out of her chest. Shuddering, she tried to remember what her doctor had told her just before she left. She tried to focus on something, anything, to pull her out of her trance.

The footprint was the only thing that came to mind. From possibly a size 9 shoe, a bit of gravel had been stuck to the bottom, the gravel now dusted on the window. She imagined the way the crunch sounded, and who could’ve stepped there. It wasn’t before long that she realized she was probably doing the exercise wrong. She sighed, still unable to bring herself to move, but beginning to piece together what her mother was telling her.

“Marinette, are you awake? I’m coming up, you have a friend here to see you.” Her mother’s familiar voice finally broke her trance like state, and she shot up.

“Maman, I’m up. I’ll be downstairs in just a minute.” She called back down, crawling out of her bed. She didn’t bother getting dressed, as she dragged herself downstairs to see familiar blonde hair.

It was either Adrien or Felix. Either way, a sense of unease washed over her. She wasn’t exactly certain why Adrien made her uneasy, but she didn’t have the time to question it as she took the last step off the stairs. The moment her feet touched the floor of her kitchen, the Agreste boy in question turned around on his stool, smiling and opening his arms for a hug.

“Marinette, you’re awake! I’m so glad to see you! I brought you some fabric, your mother told me you were low, I hope you like it!” Adrien grinned at her, and gestured slightly to the bag next to him. Marinette glimpsed at it, smiling at both the cloth and the boy before her. She almost flung herself in his arms, and he lightly wrapped his around her.

“I appreciate the gift, Adrien. Thank you. Would you like anything to eat, like breakfast or a pastry?” She pulled away from his hug, before realizing she sounded so much like her mother in that moment.

“No, but thanks! I actually want to talk to you about something personal. It’s about my brother.” Adrien’s voice dropped to a whisper, and Marinette nodded. As soon as her mother left the room, to tend to the bakery for the wedding today, Marinette brought him up to her room.

“Talk. Spill it.” She growled, her sweet demeanor quickly dropping, and he sighed.

“Marinette, while you were shopping yesterday, did he do anything to you?” Adrien sat on her chaise, and she shook her head no.

“Other than the occasional stare, and pushiness about what I got, nothing.” She sat in her computer chair, looking at the fabrics he had brought her.

“What about the day you came back?” He asked, and she shrugged.

“He just squeezed by wrist a little hard that’s all.” She stated, putting away a gentle red chiffon.

“And,” He started, nervous about the next words to come out of his mouth. “How bad do you want to kill him?”

She froze, not expecting those words to come out of his mouth. “What did he do to piss you off, that you’re asking if I want to commit murder.”

“He did nothing to me, Marinette.” He stood up, and she spun to look at him, the sincerity of his eyes, but the fury behind his words. “But we both know what he did to you.”

His words struck her, and she collapsed into herself. The tears ran down her face, faster than she could wipe them away. She lost all control, and in a fit of rage and frustration pushed all her things off of her desk. She placed her head on to the now clear desk, sobbing, and Adrien moved to calm her down. When all she could do was gasp for air, she picked her head up and stared at him.

“How long have you known?” She whispered, and he shook his head in shame.

“I only pieced it together last night. I’m sorry. He won't hurt you again, I promise.” He took her into his arms, and cradled her, taking her chair and placing her in his lap.

“You promise?” She whispered, burying her face in his chest.

“I promise.” He smiled at her, and she began to cry once again.

 

Adrien left a few hours later, leaving a much calmer Marinette alone, cleaning her room. Her kwami was fast asleep and she sighed, remembering how drained Tikki still was. She felt the same way. Still, she persisted, getting all the little dust bunnies out from under her chaise. She quietly sang to the song playing in the background, enjoying the gentle beat of Empire Ants. It had been so long since she listened to her I-pod, and every song made her feel more and more normal. Gradually, she turned her songs a bit higher, wanting to drown out the noise of the world and focus. The familiar beat of Jenny by Studio Killers hit her ears, just as she picked up the last of the dirt with the dustpan. She grinned singing along to it.

“I wanna ruin our friendship. We should be lovers instead. I don’t know how to say this, but you’re really my dearest friend.” The words fell from her lips, not Adrien, but Chat Noir coming to mind. She reminded herself it was almost time to start doing patrols again, as she continued to sing. Not before long, she was dancing around in her room. That was, until she bumped into someone.

“Quite the talent, now where was that hip movement last year?” The condescending voice made her shudder, as she quickly walked to the other side of the room and stopped the music.

“Get out of my room.” Marinette grumbled, as she got out her phone. Felix got closer to her, and she frantically searched her contacts for Adrien’s number, only assuming he put himself under a false name. She couldn’t find a single thing out of place. Did he forget to save the contact, or was the fake name just that good? She sighed, as he plucked her phone out of her hands, and slipped it into his back pocket.

“Answer the question, Where was that hip movement last year?” Felix smirked at Marinette’s defensive state. There was no way she could answer the question, and he noticed she began to crumble into her thoughts. That was until she herself smirked.

“I’m sorry, I left it with your brother. But seeing him again today, brought it back.” She smiled sweetly, but her words were spoken like knives, and pierced Felix’s ego. He couldn’t stop himself as he swung, his hand catching Marinette’s face. She fell to the floor.

“You. You will not bring up my brother in my presence ever again. He’s a disgrace.” Felix fixed his suit as Marinette began to chuckle.

“Why is he a disgrace? Because he knows how to treat a woman? Or because he doesn’t cum prematurely?” She knew she was pushing it, but she couldn’t help herself. Standing up, she continued. “Oh wait! I know! It’s because he doesn’t kidnap little girls and cram his self esteem issues into their mouths while they’re sleeping. Or is it because he doesn’t have self esteem issues in general? We both know, it’s because he’s better than you in every way. And for that, I won’t hesitate to bring him up.” She grinned, trying her hardest to imitate him, but froze when she noticed he was shaking.

“You will not speak on what you know nothing about.” His voice was wet through his clenched teeth. Then, he bursted. “DON’T YOU KNOW ANYTHING? IT’S HIS FAULT MOM IS GONE. ALL HIS FAULT! AND YOU WANT TO PROTECT HIM? HE MADE MOTHER LEAVE, AND THEN SITS THERE HAVING A PITY PARTY EVERYDAY FOR HIMSELF, BUT I CAN’T HAVE ONE THING FOR ME. YOU WERE SUPPOSED TO BE MINE. YOU ARE MINE. AND IF I EVER HEAR YOU WANT TO BE HIS, I WON’T HESITATE TO KILL YOU. DO YOU UNDERSTAND? YOU’RE. MINE. HE’S A DISGRACE, AND YOU’RE BETTER OFF WITH ME.” The tears streamed down his face, faster than the words came out of his mouth. Marinette watched him mouth off, and understood almost nothing. It couldn’t have been Adrien’s fault. She needed answers. She opened her closet, finally changing out of her pajamas for the day, right in front of the pervert. He took notice, but was too upset to act on her actions. Changing into a pair of leather pants, and a red turtleneck, she put on her boots, and headed around her room grabbing necessities. She let Tikki be, opting to grab pepper spray instead. When she was ready to leave, she extended her hand to him.

“Phone.”

He obliged, slipping the object into her hand, and taking a seat on her chaise. Then, she was gone.

* * *

 

Adrien sat in his room, staring at his computer, waiting. He wasn’t sure what he was waiting for. On one hand he expected a text from Marinette, but on the other he expected a text from his brother. He didn’t want either of those, but it was expected that one would happen. When he heard the doorbell ring, he sighed. Felix was probably home. He went to his bedroom door, and peeked out, only to have his jaw drop. It was Marinette, in the most ladybug like outfit he had ever seen. Was she here for him, or for Felix. Neither was good, considering his room was a mess, and Felix was an idiot. So, he shut his door to quickly straighten up his room, tossing empty bags of chips, and empty camembert wrappers into a bin by his bed. To his pleasant surprise, a dainty knock fell upon his door. Opening it, he saw a familiar expression. Concern.

“Marinette, what happened? Come, sit down.” He opened his door wide, gesturing for her to sit down. She shifted her weight from one foot to the other, before entering his room and sitting on his couch. She looked at the floor, her head shooting up as he sat down. They sat in silence, before the doorbell rang again. Adrien stood up and locked his door, before coming to sit back down.

“Why does Felix say it’s your fault your mother left?” She finally spoke, and Adrien froze. He could hear his blood in his ears, his pulse quickening. The one thing he didn’t want to think about.

“I don’t want to talk about that right now, Marinette.” He was stuck in a position between sitting and standing, in too much shock to pick one.

“Please, don’t say that. I need to know why. I need to know, so he can’t tell me things to twist my head. Adrien, I don’t want to fall to him, I need you to tell me what I need to stay strong. If not me, than for Ladybug, goddamnit Adrien tell me!” She stood up, and paced a bit, turning to him. He still hadn’t made up his mind about sitting. “Felix hates you. Felix hates you with a burning passion, and I need you to be okay. It’s the only way for me to be okay. You’re the only thing I have against him. Tell me Adrien. Why does he say it’s your fault?” She sat down, making up his mind for him. Pulling him down into a hug, she pressed her face into his chest. It was a dirty trick, she knew that, but she needed him to feel comfortable to tell her. It took a bit for him to finally relax, his arm resting on her shoulder.

“He says it’s my fault that mother left. And he’s right. It’s all my fault.” Adrien’s voice was dry, clearly because he had spent so much time crying over it. “I drove her away. I’d go to her every single minute I had free from lessons and authority, and she never got a break. She got sick one day, and couldn’t play with me. So I threw a tantrum. Crazy right? A thirteen year old throwing a tantrum. After she got better, I ran into her room to play with her, but all that was in there was a suitcase. When I went back there later that evening, she was gone. It’s my fault.”

“That doesn’t make sense. She left you for so long, because you threw a single tantrum?” Marinette fixed her posture, and looked him in the eyes.

“That’s the consensus. It’s agreed between father, Felix and I. It’s my fault she left, because I misbehaved.” His voice began to tremble, and Marinette hugged him before he could begin to cry. She began reassuring him.

“That’s a lie, and we both know it. You’re blamed yourself for years over this, and it’s not right. It’s as if I would blame myself for what happened to me. I can’t blame myself for my issue, and you can’t blame yourself for yours. Things happen, and we can’t always control them. You were a kid, you threw a tantrum. If she left over that single thing, she clearly had other things in her cup. There is nothing you could’ve done to stop that.” Her words were sharp, softening when needed. They were filled with anger, not because of him but because of herself. She’d blamed herself everyday she was in Felix’s hell hole, and it wasn’t until then that she accepted it wasn’t her fault. Adrien knew it just as well as Marinette. He pulled her into a hug, and laughed.

“You’re too good to me, Mari. Too good to me. First you let your family feed me. Then you help me overcome childhood trauma. I have a lot of catching up to do, princess.” He ruffled her hair, and stood up, picking her up.

“Adrien, put me down. I want to be put down.” She smiled at him, kicking off her boots.

“If you want to be put down, why are you making yourself lighter?” He grinned, carrying her up the stairs to his bookshelf.

“Because, I want to be comfortable, and I know you’re not putting me down immediately.” She crossed her arms, and he put her in a chair.

“Oh, don’t get all fussy with me! I’m gonna show you something super cool!” He grinned, scanning the shelf.

“What could be cooler than sitting on your couch with literally no entertainment?” She joked, and he gasped.

“If that’s what you consider excitement, I’ve gotten here just in time. Here, look through this.” He handed her a cloth covered book, with the numbers _‘1932-1943’_ scrawled on it. She hesitated to open it, running her fingers over the silk coating the book. He noticed her hesitation, and handed her another. _‘1944-1955’._ She opened that one, and was pleasantly surprised with bright colors. They were designs she hadn’t seen before, clearly amateur, yet exquisitely simple.

“Who… who made these?” Her hands grazed the pages, grinning at the childlike doodles.

“My grandmother. I figured you could use new design ideas, so I dug them up. But I er… I lost them a little bit before Halloween. I found them just yesterday, and figured I’d give them to you.” Adrien looked as awkward as Marinette remembered feeling. She refused to look at him, not wanting to remember when she was shy around him.

“They’re lovely Adrien. Thank you.” Marinette smiled, before the two of them heard to door handle jiggle. Looking over the banister, they saw the shut doors to his room, and Adrien began to panic. He had only locked one of the doors. They stared at each other, pale faced, as the second door creaked open.

“Adrien, are you in here? Come to the door, I’d like to have a word.” Felix spoke in the fatherly tone Gabriel so frequently used. They shuddered at the sound of his voice, and Adrien meekly walked down the steps and to the door.

“Yes, Felix?” Adrien sighed, trying to look like he wasn’t just interrupted. The look quickly faded, when Felix punched him in the jaw, the boy quickly hitting the ground. Marinette inhaled sharply, trying to remember to not say a word.

“I’d appreciate it if you’d kindly stay away from Marinette. She’s mine. All Mine. We both know that I made her mine long ago, don’t test me or I will kill her.” Felix towered over his younger brother, who simply laughed.

“You’re gonna kill her? Just cause I’m her friend and know her better? You’re even more petty than when we were kids, Felix.” Adrien wiped his mouth, and got off the floor. “You wanted everything to be yours, it’s a miracle I had mom as much as I did.” He turned to walk away, pausing for a moment to look behind him. “Marinette isn’t yours. And she isn’t mine either. She’s a human fucking being, and if you don’t treat her as such then I won’t treat you as such. It’s only fair, Felix. Now, shut the door behind you. Marinette and I have reading to do.” He smirked at his now angry brother, as he climbed the stairs. Felix stood there, gripping the door handle, knuckles white; he then slammed it, the sound echoing throughout the room.

As soon as Marinette and Adrien were face to face with each other, they laughed. It was clearly too much to handle how easily angered Felix was.

“His masculinity is so fragile.” Marinette joked, and Adrien agreed.

“He only uses things that say for men on them.” He laughed, and Marinette looked back at her book. They passed the rest of her time there with idle chit-chat, but deep down Marinette ached for deep conversation. She yearned for him to bring up her disappearance, or Felix, not knowing who to vent to about those things. But he didn’t. She sat there, in a state of frustration, debating the pros and cons of bringing it up herself. If she did bring it up, she could talk it out and feel better, like she so desperately wanted. In that same way, she’d be looking for attention, the last thing she wanted to do. Her thought left her in silence, and only one thing came to her mouth when asked what’s wrong.

“I’m going back to school in two weeks.” She looked at him, clearly nervous.

“Don’t worry, Marinette.” Adrien laughed after sighing in relief. “So much has changed at school, you’ll work much better.” He was telling the truth, but behind his words was pain.

“Adrien, what’s wrong?” She placed her hand on his, and he pulled away.

“Chloe’s missing. So is Rose and Mylene. Even Lila. I’m just worried, that’s all.” Adrien sighed, staring at the ground.

They were gone. They were gone, and no one knew where they were.

“Well, the police haven’t given up yet, right?” She grinned, and he shook his head.

“They’re looking for bodies now. Everyone’s been taking it pretty badly.” Adrien looked towards his window. “Even Alya is missing Chloe. It just feels off.” His hands shook a bit. “We’re all afraid. After what happened to you, we couldn’t survive the emotions again, more or less four more times.”

They sat in silence again.

“I’ll find them.” Marinette resolved, standing up.

“What? Marinette, no.” Adrien stood up just as quickly, holding her hand.

“Why not? If anyone has the edge on finding them, it’s me. I’ve been through it. I know where they might be. I’ll look for them. I’ll find them.” She stared at him, determination in her eyes.

“You’re gonna go as Ladybug?” He raised a brow, and she nodded.

“It’s safer that way.” Her hands instinctively went to her earrings, and she gently rubbed them.

“Then I’m coming with you.” He grinned, a familiar goofy smile.

“No, you’re staying here.” She frowned, and he looked her over.

“You don’t know do you?” He looked her over one more time as she shook her head. Had she not seen his contact name.

“Know what?” She got closer to him, and looked up at him, staring him in his eyes.That innocent look. He couldn’t help it.

“If you don’t know now, I’ll tell you later. I’ll be by your house later tonight, with a friend. We’re coming in through the roof. That should give you a good hint.” He smiled, watching her try to piece it together. Checking the time, he packed up her books, and handed them to her.

“It’s getting late, I’ll have the gorilla drive you home. I can’t go with since I have to clean my room. I’ll see you tonight.” His words flew out with barely anytime for her to process them as they walked down the stairs.

“Okay. Tonight?” She double checked, and he nodded walking her to his bedroom door.

“Tonight. See you later!” He smiled and she waved, hearing the door slam quickly as she left.

 

As soon as she was gone, he leaned his back on the door and slid down. Her eyes had killed him. Such an innocent look, his heart beat out of his chest, his knees went weak. He looked in his pants, completely in shame. Was his brother right? Did he want to take advantage of Marinette? The mere fact that she could look so innocent after everything she went through, drove him insane. He got off of the floor, pacing around, trying to run away from his thoughts. Was he really as dark and twisted as his brother? Could he really have such a desire for power? Slamming his hand onto the wall, he noticed Plagg sitting on his shelf.

“You woke me up, what’s going on?” The kwami grumbled, floating in front of it’s chosen.

“I don’t want to be like my brother.” Adrien grumbled in return.

“Then don’t. Be better. Simple as that.” Plagg zipped away, catching the familiar whiff of camembert. Adrien nodded at Plagg’s words, his worries being lifted off his chest.

He didn’t have to be like his brother, he could be better. He would be better. And the first step to being better, was to help Marinette find their classmates.

He wouldn’t let what happened to her happen to them.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm really sorry that this seems rushed. I'm dealing with finals right now. If anyone wants to ask me anything about the chapters, or update dates, message me on tumblr. I check Tumblr way more than I check here. Also, if you guys want to request fanfiction, send it there. It'll be good for when I get writers block, and you can get your own stories ^u^.  
> literal-trash-oops.tumblr.com


	4. Healing

Upon getting home, three things were clear to Marinette. Adrien, though sweet and kind, would most likely be utterly useless for what she was going to do. Her task was daunting, and would be nearly impossible with Felix breathing down her neck. And with her return as Ladybug, the media would rarely give her a break. 

She groaned, entering her room, noticing her still sleeping kwami. She gently ran her finger on Tikki’s head, a small noise coming from her. Sighing in relief, Marinette began her nightly routine. Routine kept her calm. Routine made sense. Deep down, she knew routine wouldn’t change anything, but it comforted her. She changed into her pajamas, brushed her hair, and went to bed. It was only 7:30, she knew that, but laying down made her comfortable. She stared at her ceiling, spacing out, almost feeling as if she wasn’t completely there to watch the glass sky light. Her mind raced with empty thoughts, unable to focus on any particular one. It was all just white noise. They echoed, as they crashed around, and her core sank lower. It was almost as if she was falling, and watching herself fall at once. She could just almost reach out and pull herself up, but it was too confusing to try. She stared at the ceiling, now feeling farther from it. She couldn’t pull her vision into focus, the transition between ceiling and skylight being a blur. She could hear her heart beating, though she couldn’t figure out quite what it was. She could hear every breath she made, and the blood pumping by her ears, her pulse almost strong enough that she could grab it. She didn’t even try reaching for it. She stayed in that confusion, between hallucinating and dissociating, for an awfully long while. She still hadn’t snapped out of it when a figure appeared on her window. Her mind screamed,  _ “It’s Adrien. Get up, it’s Adrien.” _ But her body couldn’t process her mind. He tapped on the window, her own mind drowning out the sound. Peeking into the window, Chat watched the sweat coated Marinette try to focus. He panicked, letting himself in, and looking her over. She was completely still, the only thing moving was her eyes as she tried to focus. 

“Marinette, snap out of it. Come, you need to get away from your thoughts, snap out of it.” He whispered, petting her hair. Her mind screamed, but she remained still. “C’mon. I need to talk to you, Marinette. It’s about Adrien.” 

_ “Adrien? Adrien! He’s going to talk about Adrien!”  _ Her thoughts all agreed for once, but she couldn’t pull herself out. They stayed the way they were for what felt like eternity, before Marinette finally blinked.  _ Focus. _ She blinked again.  _ Focus. _ She moved her arms.  _ Focus. _ She sniffed the air, the smell of cologne and leather filling her lungs.  _ Smell. Smell Chat.  _ She licked her lips, her strawberry chapstick reminding her of the season.  _ Dry lips, but tasty.  _ She listened, hearing the distant sound of cars. Finally, she blinked again, staring at Chat Noir.  _ He has something to tell me. I need to listen. _

Sitting up, she smiled at him, before realizing he was here and not Adrien. 

“What happened to Adrien?” Her voice was hollow, lacking the needed emotions. It required too much right now, to be sad.

“Oh. Nothing! Nothing happened!” He smiled, obviously nervous. Where was her suave Chat? “He just needs to pass a message on to you. Will you listen?” Chat smiled as sweetly as possible, and Marinette’s face changed. A mix between determination and frustration. 

“I’ll listen.” She nodded, and he covered her eyes with his hand. 

“Okay. This is a surprise, so you need to be quiet and wait while I get it ready.” Chat spoke to her as if she was a child, but she assumed it was Adrien’s exact request. She heard him mutter something, and felt the energy of his transformation peel off. 

“Chat, why did you take off your transformation? What’s going on?” The panic in her voice became clear, until he let go of her eyes.

“It’s alright, Marinette. You’re safe.” The warm comforting eyes of Adrien Agreste stared at her with more kindness than she had ever expected. 

“Adrien. You’re Chat.” She reached her hand out, placing it on his chest as if he was an illusion. He wasn’t. 

“Yes, Princess. I’m Chat.” He smiled, and she practically fell apart. Her barely-there composure disappeared, and tears began falling down, hitting her balled up hands. 

“You kept Tikki safe, and I don’t know how to thank you. I don’t know how to thank you for how hard you’ve worked while I was gone. I don’t know how to thank you for what you’ve done for me, or for each time you took the hit so I wouldn’t.” Her words were barely coherent, but he understood. 

“I don’t know how to thank you, Marinette. You gave me happiness. And I’m going to return the favor. Where’s your kwami, let's go out tonight.” Adrien clearly had a plan, but Marinette simply shook her head no. 

“Tikki is sleeping. She is so tired after finally gaining a physical form again. Bringing you the earrings was too exhausting for her, her power is so weak.” Marinette’s voice trembled even more at the mention of her Kwami. It hurt her to think that if she hadn’t been taken, Tikki would be okay. The only thing keeping her strong was the fact that her experience would allow her to help her friends. 

“What? Tikki’s that drained?!” Plagg finally spoke up, curled up on Marinette’s pillow. 

“Yes. I’m really worried…” She trailed off, and as if in each other's heads, Plagg and Adrien’s eyes lit up at the same time. 

“Bring her to the healer!” They shouted at once, scaring Marinette out of her skin. 

“The healer?” She thought about what they could’ve meant before it hit her. That weird vet. “Oh! Yeah! Him!” She grinned, shooting out of bed and down to where her Kwami rested. She gently lifted Tikki, and tapped her to wake her up.

“W-what is it Marinette?” Her voice was stronger than before, but her eyes lulled along with her head. 

“Tikki, I’m going to bring you to that vet guy, okay? But I can’t leave the house this late. Can you transform me for just five minutes?” Marinette asked, and Adrien got ready to transform himself. The kwami nodded at her chosen, and the pair simultaneously transformed. As soon as they did, Marinette’s earrings beeped. 

They launched themselves out of the skylight and off of the roof, going to the little shop where the healer was. Marinette quickly removed her transformation, as did Adrien, and they knocked on the door. A minute in the cold, and Marinette reconsidered her decision to stay in her pajamas, and to leave in house slippers. Adrien huddled closer to her, ignoring Plagg’s grumbling. The door opened, and Master Fu stared at the pair. 

“It’s you again. Ah, and Adrien! Please, do come in.” He beckoned for them to enter, shutting the door behind them, but the cold remained bound to their bones. They followed him into the familiar room that Marinette had seen before, and she placed Tikki onto the pillow. 

“My er… cat is uh really sick.” Marinette lied, as Adrien took a seat next to her. 

“Ah, Ladybug, there is no need for such secrets anymore.” The old man said, checking on the kwami. 

“What?! You know I’m her?” She blurted before she could stop herself. 

“I knew from the first time you brought her. After all, I gave you your earrings.” He smiled, as he began to move his hands over the kwami. “She’s severely exhausted, her energy beyond drained.” 

“Can you make her better? Please tell me you can make her better…” Marinette’s eyes pleaded with him, leaving the old man in shambles. 

“I’m not sure. You need to understand, she broke the rules. She removed your earrings, and flew away with them. That’s almost like- consider this. Every Kwami is like a rechargeable battery. They give power to the earrings, and as long as the earrings are- for lack of a better word- on they function. Flying in and out of what they must power, only leaving to recharge. But when removed, the earrings are turned off. An object that’s been turned off has no use for a battery, and the kwami is sucked back in. If the battery continues going, it leads to a sort of powdery white build-up on the outside, and then the batteries must be replaced. Since Kwami’s are organic life, though magical they are limited to choices when they’re drained so thoroughly. It’s as if your heart was removed from your body, and expected to keep beating with no connection to blood. It puts too much strain to the heart, it’s too dangerous. So that is what Tikki is going through. Strain. It’s so intense, that even I am stumped as to how I’ll help her.” Master Fu stood up, looking behind him. A green kwami floated forward, shaking it’s head. 

“I’m afraid there is only one thing we can do.” The kwami sat, perched on it’s chosens shoulder. “Give her a jump.” 

“A jump? Like a car?” Adrien snorted a bit in disbelief, before clearing his throat. “How would that be done?” 

“Ahh, well, that’s the tricky thing. It’s only been successfully done once before, as it’s only been needed once, and it wasn’t with the Ladybug miraculous. The story has been passed down from the previous healers, but it’s gotten quite… unclear. Regionalized dialects and drunk teachers over the centuries, has made the instructions a bit off putting.” He pulled a slip of paper out of his pocket, oddly shaped letters littering the page. Marinette instantly recognized them from Adrien’s book. 

“If you look here, it’ll say a number to telegram to receive a fridge for a good price. And right there looks much like a of a sort of fanfiction. ‘When they embrace, bodies pressed together, sweat glistening off of their skin, the spark will ignite in a burning passion.’ Allow us just a moment to sort it, this has turned into a sort of scrap paper.” The kwami spoke before the two descended on the paper, silently bickering. 

Marinette turned to face the window, sighing as she watched the cars pass. The world kept on, and she pressed her nails into her palms to keep her from spacing out. The street lights slowly blurred as she began to focus on something else. There was a car stopped in front of the building, one that wasn’t there before. Stepping out of the car was a lanky man in a thick coat, his hood down. He looked up at the window and she froze. Felix was there. Felix knew where she was. 

“Close the blinds.” She whispered, catching the attention of everyone in the room. 

“Hmm? What’s wrong Marinette?” Adrien came to her side, Marinette quickly shooing him away. 

“Not you. He’ll see you, Felix will see you!” She screamed, and Master Fu quickly stood up, shutting the blinds. 

“There will be no hysterics in this. You must both keep calm.” Master Fu put a reassuring hand on Marinette’s shoulder. “Breathe. It’s time. Kneel next to your kwami.” 

Marinette sat by Tikki’s side, her kwami getting paler by the minute. 

“Now follow my instructions absolutely, and this will be successful. Marinette, you are to remove one earring and place it on your kwami, holding it in place. Adrien, you’re to touch her remaining earring with the hand without your ring. Marinette, touch his earring.” The two scrambled to do as told, a slightly awkward arm position made by the instructions. “This next part must be done swiftly. Time it just right. Adrien, you must transform, and Marinette you need to after you feel the energy surge.”

“What? Now hold up just a minute, you really think my energy can spark her back up? That’s impossible!” Plagg began to throw a fit, and Adrien yelled frustratedly catching Marinette off guard. 

“Claws out!” 

“Wait no-” He shouted, being sucked into the ring. Marinette waited, before feeling the power of his transformation through her hand, and in the earring she held against her finger.”

“Tikki,” she pleaded tears forming in her eyes. “Spots on.” 

The kwami’s eyes shot open, as she was sucked into the earrings. Frantically putting the other earring on, Marinette felt her own transformation, and for a moment she heard a familiar laugh. She froze, as the spotted layered nylon mesh covered her appendages. Felix hadn’t left. Felix had to have seen the light shine through the curtains. She prayed he didn’t, as she looked down to see her transformation. Sighing in relief as her earrings didn’t beep, she quickly grinned, hugging the old man before her. 

“Thank you. Thank you so much.” She nearly cried, and he patted her. 

“It isn’t an issue. Now go, before the man comes in to find you.” He smiled, waving her off as they headed for the door. 

“Wait, take off your transformation. If Felix see’s me bring you home, he’ll be less suspicious. We don’t want him finding out you’re Ladybug.” 

Marinette nodded, removing her transformation and hugging her smiling kwami. They sat in silence as Adrien opened the door, lifting up Marinette, preparing to bring her home. They stopped, looking at a smirking Felix. 

“May I help you sir?” Chat spoke, Marinette noticing the vocal difference. 

“Yes, I’d like to know who’s establishment this is, and what you’re doing with that minor.” Felix stepped forward, ready to accuse both of crimes. 

“This is Master Fu’s alternative medicine shop. I’m just bringing her home. We happened to be in at about the same time.” Chat laughed, removing his baton and preparing to leave. 

“Marinette, why were you there this late?” Felix got closer, placing a hand on her face. “And without a coat or boots.” 

“I was dissociating really bad, and I came for a cup of herbal tea and some acupuncture. Worked like a dream. I’m going home now, please never see me again.” She faked a smile, and tapped Chat on the shoulder. He nodded, extending his baton and launching them into the sky. “Have a great night, I hate you!” She shouted, waving to the creep. 

Instantly regretting her impulsive action, she buried her head into Adriens leather clad shoulder. She would need to deal with him another day. For now she was alright. All was right in her life. All was right. Right?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm sorry this was such a short chapter and took such a long while, and I know it's absolutely awful and out of character in a way.   
> I promise I'll update before september.   
> I just have 6 WIP's in total, and theyre not all ready to post and I'm just screaming.   
> The next chapter is gonna be much better, I promise.


	5. Morals are One Hell of a Drug

Marinette slept easy that night. Her body sank into her bed and she realized how lucky she was. She was still a superhero, she was still in control. She was still capable of standing up to the evil in that world. She felt in her heart, the weight of her own determination. Not only determination to take Felix down, but determination to save her classmates. Staring at her smiling Kwami, she resolved to save them as Marinette, not as Ladybug. 

Adrien had made sure her room was secured, for no reason other than paranoia on her behalf. No amount of reassurance convinced him she could handle herself. 

“Adrien, it’s fine. I’m alright, really.” She pleaded as he checked the locks on the doors downstairs. 

“I don’t want you feeling scared. I hated the way you looked earlier. I never want you to feel that afraid again.” He grumbled, tugging on the door roughly. 

“I won’t! I’ll be alright! Go home, and get some rest. After all, you can’t protect me if you’re tired,  _ Chaton _ .” She drew out the last word as if it was the only thing that mattered. He shuddered, turning around to the sleepy girl in front of him. Seated on the steps, with her head resting on the banister, her bangs partly covering her face. Sighing, he scooped her up. 

“You’re right. I’ll bring you to bed and tuck you in. Then I’ll go home and sleep.” He smiled, and she looked up at him, grinning. 

“Damn right I’m right.” She muttered. 

“Marinette, I may be a hero and a gentleman, but I will drop you and leave.” He joked, opening the door to her living room. 

“I fuckin dare you.” She yawned out the barely coherent sentence. 

“What was that, I couldn’t quite hear you over your exhaustion. Sleep.” He laughed at her, as he placed her into her bed, pulling the covers up to her chin. 

“You will not tell me what to do, sir.” She sat up and stuck out her tongue. 

“As Chat mother fucking Noir I will suggest you go to sleep or I’ll need to take action.” He crawled into her bed, standing slightly on her shelf to open the skylight. 

“Ooooh, I feel so intimidated. You’re lucky I’m tired.” She laid back down, watching her friend climb onto the roof. 

“No, you’re lucky you’re tired. See you around bugaboo.” He poked his head into the room and blew her a kiss. 

“Get out you mangy thing.” She rolled over, and shut her eyes. 

“Love you too!” He laughed, shutting the skylight and disappearing into the light.

* * *

 

The morning came with a lot of commotion downstairs. Marinette opened her eyes, and strolled downstairs to see her mother standing at the door, her head poked into the hallway. 

“Maman, who’s there?” She yawned, opening the fridge. No orange juice, weird. Her mother opened the door, turning to her daughter. 

“Felix is here again, sweetheart. I’m going to give the two of you some privacy, I’ll be downstairs!” She grinned, and Marinette could’ve sworn her mother was hoping for something. Quickly wiping the disgusted look off of her face, she turned to face the man towering above her. The door shut, as her pulse began to pound in her ears. 

“Have a great night, I hate you?” He began to laugh. “Have a great night, I hate you?!” Do you really think you have that much control over the situation? Well, do you?” He sat on a stool, leaning on the counter. 

“I-I do have that much control.” Marinette felt her stomach tighten, a familiar queasy feeling overwhelming her. 

“Oh, it doesn’t sound like it. Did you think just because Chat Noir brought you home, that you were safe?” He smirked at the way she looked down at her feet, looking her up and down. 

“No. I thought that I was safe because I’m in control.” She heard her pulse quicken in her ears, as she looked around the room. He was going to lunge for her any minute, she needed to get away. 

“If you’re so in control,” His eyes locked onto her panicked state, standing up as if cued to. “Then why are you submitting to me so easily? Or do you actually want this?” 

“W-what do you mean?” She backed away, the stairs touching her, her escape being clear. 

“I mean, you’re still mine.” He was inches away from her, when she shoved him away, scrambling up the stairs. He quickly bounded after her, making his way up to her room. She cowered in the corner, her hands trembling as she struggled to unlock her phone. He slammed the trapdoor, catching her attention. 

“Get away from me, Felix.” She spat, trying to regain her composure. 

“Oh, don’t be like that. I brought you something. It’ll help you relax, keep the fear away. Takes the edge off of almost everything. Can’t say I’m an awful person, if I’m treating you so nice.” He cautiously approached her, and a tear shot down her face. 

“You’re not an awful person. You’re a monster.” She watched him rummage through his coat pocket, forgetting that she was mid-text. 

“Here, take this.” His voice softened, as he pulled a prescription bottle from his pocket. “They really help.” 

“I’m not taking anything from you.” She muttered, looking back at her phone. 

“Suit yourself.” He chuckled, as he leapt over her chaise, his hand quickly wrapping around her neck, lifting her off the ground in one movement. She clawed at him, the shock making it impossible to breathe. Opening her mouth to gasp for air, he took a pill from the bottle and placed it on her tongue. “You know the drill. Swallow and I’ll stop choking you.”

Reluctantly, she gave in, swallowing the pill. It scraped down her throat, and she nearly gagged at the feeling of the pill combined with the sudden gasp of air. She looked up at him, coughing and gasping for air, only to be met with cold unfeeling eyes. 

“It’ll kick in in about 20 minutes. Don’t take more than 2 in eight hours, and don’t drink. No one likes alcoholic junkie girls. I’ll be here tomorrow at 10 sharp. If you’re not dressed and ready to go, you’re not gonna like it.” He turned around, approaching the trap door. 

She froze, replaying what had just happened in her head over and over again. She lost her will and submitted. She wasn’t okay, she was still afraid. Tears ran down her face, and nothing could console her. 

Before she knew it, she had spent a half an hour crying. Her body felt prickly, and her eyes widened. Everything felt so amazing, her clothes against her skin, the floor against her feet, her hands against her face. She didn’t stop crying, the tears felt too good. Too pure. She was strong, and she felt it. She scanned the room, looking for something soft, deciding to lay in her bed. The way her body felt against the comforter, she couldn’t help but lay there, a trail of drool coming out of her mouth as she cried. 

She stayed in her room for the remainder of the day. Tikki tried to talk to her, tried to console her, but Marinette stayed quiet. The feelings went away as Marinette fell asleep, her mind as fuzzy and warm as her body felt. 

Her dreams were plagued with nightmares, things she would kill to forget. She jolted awake at nine o’clock in the morning, her body aching. Her stomach growled, and she remembered she hadn’t eaten in over eighteen hours. Rolling out of bed, her body felt heavy and she glanced at the pill bottle on her chaise. Grumbling, she headed to brush her teeth, shower and eat something. Everything felt wrong, the water wouldn’t hit the right temperature, she would brush too rough or too soft, and her toast was half burnt. She thought back to the pills in her room, before a knock on her door brought her back down to Earth. It was ten o’clock and she was only half dressed. Running upstairs and leaving her half finished toast on the kitchen table, she slipped on a sweater, and her shoes. Tikki floated into her purse, and Marinette dashed downstairs. 

“You’re late, Marinette,” Felix grumbled, as he took a bite out of her toast. 

“I’m not late. I was ready. That’s all you instructed.” She replied, snatching her toast away from him. 

“I’ll let it slide. Did you take one today?” He sat in her seat and sipped some of her orange juice. 

“No. I don’t need any pills.” Her matter of fact tone caused him to raise a brow and chuckle. 

“We’ll see after today.” He stood up, putting his arm around her waist, and grabbing her coat. “There’s a town car downstairs, so you’ll only need your coat later.”

“If you don’t let go of me, I swear to everything-” She was cut off by him digging his nails into her waist. She whimpered, unable to object. 

“Good girls don’t swear. Good girls obey.” He growled in her ear, before forcefully walking her out of the house and down the stairs. He practically shoved her in the car, quickly entering after her. 

“You know, I might actually enjoy these little car rides if I wasn’t ya know, forced in” She frowned, and he smirked. 

“There’s a lot of things you’d enjoy if they weren’t forced in,” he drew out the word forced as if it pained him to mention it. She winced. “Can I show you something, mon ami.”

“It’s not like you’re not going to anyway.” She grumbled as he pulled her close unlocking his phone. 

“Take a close look at this picture, see anything familiar?” He opened his gallery, revealing a picture of a situation Marinette knew too well. A slim blonde girl was tied to the wall, covered in semen, feces, and dried blood. In her mouth was more of the mixture and the more she looked the worse it got. There was clearly a blunt object shoved into her delicate area, possibly the remains of a baseball bat. What haunted Marinette the most was her face, contorted in a pained howl. The face of none other than a desecrated Chloe Bourgeois. 

“What did you do to Chloe?” She croaked, memories flooding back to her of her time with him. 

“Nothing I haven’t done to you. Okay, maybe a few things.” He cooed as if it would calm her down.

“Where is she?” Tears welled in her eyes as she saw the multitude of pictures of her classmate. 

“Oh, I’m sure you’d like to know. You want to save her, don’t you. You want to save the little slut.” He grinned, as Marinette began to tremble. “I’ll tell you everything you want to know if you submit to me.” 

There was silence, and Marinette realized the car had never pulled out of its parking spot. 

“What would submitting to you entail?” Marinette broke the silence, sweat forming on her forehead. 

“Nothing you haven’t been through before. Okay, maybe a few things.” He smirked, removing his scarf, and unbuttoning the top button on his shirt. 

“And you’ll let them go?” She said, seeing the very last photo in the gallery.

“I’ll let her go if you agree. The rest… if you obey.”He unbuttoned another button, drawing out the third as if it was circumstantial. 

“I’ll do it. I’ll,” she choked on her words, trying not to tear up, “I’ll submit to you. 

“Excellent. You really are something else Marinette. Now come give Daddy Felix a kiss.” He laughed, staring at the photo she has stopped at. He knew it would put her over the edge. How else would she react to seeing her someone, hastily dressed like her being brutalized.

* * *

 

_ Breaking News: The location of Chloe Bourgeois has been discovered by Ladybug and Chat Noir. More on the story at eight.  _

The television on the background was a distraction, as Marinette stared at herself in the mirror. White kitty lingerie, how distasteful. She walked over to the bed where her Master, lay, slipping in next to him. The afternoon sun poured in through the window, and the young heroine teared up, as she placed a pill in her mouth. Swallowing it, she spread her legs as he got on top of her. He grinned, removing his boxers and thrusting into her without warning. She didn’t scream, she didn’t cry out. She laid there and took it. For Chloe, for all her classmates, for every girl in Paris, she took his full length. She began to bleed, the blood staining the white sheets under her, and as her tears ran down her face she could’ve sworn she saw Chat Noir through the window. 

Her heart broke at the thought, but it didn’t matter because she would keep him safe too. 

At that moment, she accepted her life to be that of a Martyr. 

At that moment her mind blanked out, and her life felt warm and fuzzy. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I got very very stuck, but it's finally up. Once again, feel free to contact me on tumblr literal-trash-oops, if you have any questions of fan fic requests.  
> School is starting again soon, so that means restricted computer access so I'll have no choice but to write new chapters.   
> Yes, I know this is a super messed up story, please don't tell me that in my ask box. Or do, but with criticism.


	6. Tragedy

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm very sorry at the possibility of this being out of character, also a warning this is a pretty awful chapter. I didn't proofread this because I wrote it in such a rush yesterday, so it's very short. FW: Brief watersports TW: Character death.

The night Chloe was found, Adrien was seething with rage. As if he was the very embodiment of an overfilled water balloon, it all poured out at once, splattering Marinette with his boiling fury.

“WHAT DO YOU MEAN YOU'RE HIS SLAVE?” He shouted as they made their way to the building. 

“Adrien, calm down it was the only way,” she attempted to console him, will no results. 

“So you'll just suck the creeps dick for the greater good?! What else is this going to en- _tail_?!” His voice lowered as they passed a residential, but he stared at her as if to make it clear he would not calm down, but he would lighten up with a pun. 

“I'll be going through what I went through before, but with less scarring. He says there’ll be new stuff too, I don't wanna think about it.” she trailed off, feeling nauseated at the thought. 

“Marinette, you're better than this. You're Ladybug for fucks sake, you can just kick his ass.” Adrien shouted as they approached the tiny cabin. A mile out, just like the last one. 

“I can't, because he knows where they are and I don't. I can't beat it out of him. Just trust me.” she muttered as she plunged through a weak part in the ceiling. Just like Felix described, Chloe was tied up with a candle in her princess parts, the wax almost completely melted. Marinette cringed, remembering how she picked the wax out from her hair for days. Quickly blowing out the candle and turning in a light, she peeled the hot wax off while Chat untied the poor girl. Chloe was silent, her eyes lifeless, haunting Chat the same way Mariette's did. The police arrived as soon as they had fed Chloe a thermos of chicken soup. Chloe was safe. 

One down, god knows how many to go.

* * *

 

Marinette woke up around eight PM, panicking as she struggled against the restraints on her wrists. Her mouth was dry, and she wheezed as she searched the room. The snow was falling, she could clearly see that from the window. She heard the distant sound of a bathroom vent whirring, and she sighed in relief. 

“Felix, baby, what time is it I need to get home.” Her voice was hoarse, and he popped his head out of the bathroom with a toothbrush in his mouth. 

“It’s a little past eight. We got another round before I let you go. Don’t worry, I called your mother and told her you fell asleep.” His words were slightly muffled, and he ducked back in the bathroom to spit in the sink. 

“Felix, could you bring me a drink and a pill?” She relaxed as he got near, swiping a bottle off his nightstand and taking a pill out. 

“I got your drink right here Mari, c’mon take it. Maybe tomorrow, I’ll tell you where your little friend Rose is.” He said, tugging down his boxer. 

She hated his weird fetishes, and hated calling him baby even more, but it was better than a paddle. Opening her mouth, he placed the pill on her tongue before a steady stream escaped him. Gulping it down, she swallowed the pill, trying not to gag as her mouth overflowed. As she swallowed the last drop she was greeted with the task of licking his member clean, and sighing in relief as he released the constraints. 

“Alright, you’ve been good today so I’ll let you go a bit early. Tomorrow, come over with the ropes on, and I’ll give you a little treat. Now give me a kiss, honey.” Felix grinned, looking vaguely like Adrien. Marinette quickly shook the thought away before kissing him and putting on her clothes. Leaving her panties just like he requested, she slipped on her pants and boots before leaving. 

* * *

She went home, popping another pill in her mouth while she walked. She danced about as she listened to the distant sound of Christmas music in various shops. Making her way up the stairs, she glanced at the tree in her living room. Christmas was in two days. Then there was only a week before the new year. She climbed the steps to her room, turning on the light to see the familiar leather-clad hero standing in her room.

“Plagg is worried about you.” He said as soon as she entered the room. 

“Is that to say you aren't anymore?” The words slipped out of her lips before she could catch herself, and she quickly covered her mouth. “I’m sorry, I didn’t mean-” 

“No, I get it. It’s kinda hard not to be an asshole when you’re around Felix so much.” Adrien stood up, allowing his miraculous to disband, the grumpy Kwami appearing before Marinette. 

“He’s not a healthy man. I get chills just looking at him, you need to stop this. How does Tikki feel about this?” Plagg looked her in the eyes, but Marinette avoided eye contact. “You have told her, right?”

Marinette shook her head, sticking her hand into her pockets. In a swift movement, she tucked her hair behind her ears and took her earrings out of her pockets. 

“I take them out once a day. When Tikki asked why I just said that they were hurting my ears. I don’t want her to know.” Marinette looked at the floor, clearly riddled with guilt. Adrien kicked her desk, clearly trying not to take his frustration out on the source. 

“She’s the only one who can protect you, and you just put her away! What if he takes you again, what if I can’t find you. Then what? Am I just supposed to give up? Look for the others, knowing no hail mary is going to try to give me hope?” Adrien teared up and kicked her desk again before giving up and taking a seat on her stairs. 

Marinette on the other hand, was far from frustrated. The room felt warm, and she grinned. Reaching into her pocket, she pulled out another pill and swallowed it before laying on her chaise. 

“What was that?” Plagg asked, and Marinette put one of her earrings back in. “Answer me, Marinette. What did you just take? Are you doing drugs?” 

Adrien stood up, approaching Marinette cautiously, as she stared out her window. “Marinette, why aren’t you answering Plagg? Are you alright?” He sat by her feet where he saw her face. Tears running down her cheeks, her mouth wide open, and she gently moved her hand around in her shirt. 

Adriens face flared up, the brightest shade of red dusting his cheeks. Marinette was mostly likely tweaked out of her mind, but on what. What could cause her to space out and fondle herself? He stumbled back, trying regain his composure, his mind screaming that he didn’t want to be like his brother. Staring at his friends figure as she rolled over and whined slightly, he felt his pants getting tight. 

_ No, no no. I can’t do this. I can’t sexualize her, I need to help her. _

His mind screamed to do something, and he took a deep breath trying to clear his mind, but only one thought came to him.  **_F e e d_ ** . Shaking his head, he looked at Plagg who was equally mortified. Barely more composed, he approached his friend with a hand extended. She had begun drooling, and Adrien tried his hardest to not think what his brother would think. The next best thing was disgust in his mind, and he promptly went to correct her actions. He roughly removed her hand from her shirt and, before he knew it, ripping her off of her chaise. He stumbled back in shock, as she finally spoke. 

“I did what you like, Felix, please don’t be rough.” 

He was dumbfounded, before regaining his senses and searching her body for the drugs. Snapping a picture of the pill bottle, he heaved her over his shoulder, only to realize she was lighter than a week ago. 

Adrien placed Marinette in her bed, slipping her sweater off to make her more comfortable. She wasn’t going to sober up for quite a while, and Adrien had come to terms with that. Stroking her hand, he sat next to her and gently rocked her until she fell asleep. 

He left almost immediately after she began snoring, wondering what in the hell is phencyclidine, and what was the smudged out word. He needed answers, he needed a doctor. He needed Master Fu. 

* * *

The next morning, Marinette woke up desperate to feel. Popping a pill in her mouth, she climbed out of bed and got dressed. Christmas eve was not a day she wanted to deal with, and as soon as she got downstairs all she smelled was gingerbread. Her stomach growled, but she ignored it heading to sit on her couch. Barely catching her reflection in the window, she turned on the TV and listened to the news. There was a knock at the door, but Marinette didn’t rise to get it. There was another and the door opened. The familiar smell of Tide detergent filled the room, and the door was kicked shut.

“Marinette, give me a hand.” The person said, but she didn’t move. “Please, your laundry is really heavy and I’m not sure how much longer I can hold this.” 

Turning around, she saw the familiar vibrant shade of blonde she so often swooned over. Leaping over the couch, she grabbed her laundry and ran it upstairs. 

“Adrien, what are you doing here?” She croaked, her voice dry since she hadn’t drank anything.

“Well, it’s Christmas Eve, and I figured you’d want someone to hang out with. I brought some movies over, I figured we could watch them.” Grinning, Adrien took off his backpack. 

“I… I can’t. I’m sorry, it’s just I need to see-” 

“Felix again. I know. Which is why I’ll take the hit for this one. More so, Chat Noir will. Alas, fair maiden Marinette hast been akumatized. Thus, it is with great honor and bravery that I, the magnificent Chat Noir, rescue the damsel in distress. She put up a good fight, and I was almost defeated, but the heart persisteth on. Victorious was I, as it got late, and the beautiful LadyBug released the akuma, saving all of Paris, as well as the beautiful woman who holds my heart.” Adrien was in what was referred to as ‘the drama zone’. For the first time in a week, Marinette laughed. 

“Alright, alright. Just don’t put on anything scary, and take your shoes off. Maman mopped yesterday.” Marinette went back to the couch, flopping down while Adrien giddily took a movie out. 

“Let’s watch… Ponyo!” Adrien spun around, holding the DVD case in his hand. Popping it into the player, he settled next to Marinette and grinned, completely forgetting to change the TV settings to AV. Marinette quickly noticed, grabbing the remote and switching it. 

They sat together, quickly becoming absorbed with the adorable movie. They watched the whole thing, oblivious of what was happening around them. 

“That. Was honestly the best thing I’ve ever seen.” Marinette laughed. 

“I know right! It’s so cute. Let’s watch Howl’s Moving Castle next.” Adrien stood up, and turned around before freezing. 

“What’s wrong? Did you step where I spilled the Sprite? I might have socks for you, just-” She stood up, turning around and freezing just like Adrien did before her. 

In their living room was, surprisingly, not Felix but Lila. Drenched in her own blood, smelling of perfume and decay, she dangled from where she was hung. Her body was limp and lifeless as it swung ever so gently. Carved into her skin were Kanji letters, which frightened Marinette even more. She only knew one person that knew Japanese fluently. Felix. But, she knew Felix wasn’t capable of murder. He couldn’t have killed her. How did he hang her so silently? How didn’t she make a noise. It clicked. 

“Cut her down!” She screeched, and Adrien quickly transformed, sucking a sleeping Plagg into his ring. Instantly slicing through the rope, Marinette caught Lila as she fell. Opening the girls mouth, she removed a wadded up piece of paper, and began to perform CPR.  Tears welled up in Marinette’s eyes, and she pressed down once more. 

Only a few minutes passed, before Marinette gave up. Lila was beyond her help. She was going to die, and LadyBug herself couldn’t save her. 

Adrien called 911, while Marinette washed her hands. Nothing she did could get the blood stains out, and she popped a pill in her mouth. The police came, and questioned Chat Noir, and Marinette, before moving on to talking to her parents. 

The EMT’s weren’t sure she would survive. 

The police wasn’t sure if she would survive. 

Marinette wasn’t sure she would survive. 

 

But Marinette was positive, without a doubt in her mind, Felix would pay for this. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry I took so long to post this. I forgot I was writing this after getting wrapped up in the college application process. Hopefully, the next one will be typed and completed within a week, but who knows.  
> As always you can contact me at literal-trash-oops on tumblr. See you next update.


	7. Happy Holidays?

Christmas day came with panic. The police hadn’t left Marinette’s living room, still dusting for prints but not finding anything. The christmas gifts had been torn open and searched for evidence, nothing coming up. Marinette still held onto the paper in her hands, too afraid to open it. When they finally left, it was much too late to start on Christmas dinner. The Dupain-Chengs sat in their living room in silence for what had happened. Marinette knew. She knew everything. But there was nothing she could do or say. They stared at the wall, not wanting to make eye contact, their hopes for the holidays shattered. There was a knock at the door but no one answered it. It grew more persistent, and Marinette stood up to get it. The door opened, and Adrien came in. 

“Marinette, are your parents home?” He asked, obviously trying to fake cheerfulness for her sake. She nodded and her parents rose from the couch to greet him. 

It was stiff, and rehearsed as if they were practicing for an intrusion on their silence but Adrien's warm smile slowly melted their demeanor. 

“So what brings you by today?” They asked, much more relaxed at the presence of the charming young man in front of them. 

“Well…” His tone shifted for a moment, something only Marinette noticed. “My father invited you all over to Christmas dinner at my home, considering the unfortunate circumstances at the moment. He also bought you all gifts, and would love it if you could join us.” 

“We have no gifts in return though…” Marinette’s father spoke up, ashamed of the situation. 

“Oh, don’t worry about that. A gift doesn’t need to be returned! It just needs to be cherished.” He smiled at Marinette then, and she remembered how he had returned Tikki to her, and looked away from him. She wasn’t wearing her earrings. Was he throwing shade at her?

“Well, we would love to join you! We just-” Marinette’s mother spoke, but was quickly cut off. 

“Don’t worry, we’ll give you time to get ready. I insist you come.” He let the words roll off and they began to sound more sinister, before it clicked. It wasn’t Adrien speaking, it was Felix dressed like Adrien. 

“I’ll go get ready.” Marinette spoke as fast as she could, in order to leave. She slammed the trapdoor to her room shut and quickly put on the earrings. “Tikki, Felix is dressed as Adrien, I’m worried, what if something happened.”

Groggily, Tikki answered. “It’s probably a trap Marinette. Be careful.” She yawned, floating over to the cookies to eat one. 

“I’m going to wear you all night, okay?” She whispered, hearing footsteps up her stairs, and tossing on a short red dress and black thigh highs under it. She pushed back her hair with a red headband before slipping Tikki into the thin strapped black Michael Kors bag. She tossed on her coat, and made her way out of her room, coming face to face with Felix. 

“Nice to see you understand what I want.” He joked, making his way back down the stairs. 

“It’s not for you, it’s for Adrien. You can suck my whole dick, Felix.” She snarled, making her descent and snatching the ear cuffs off the counter to spruce up her earrings. 

“You act like I wouldn’t if it were an option.” He purred, a sly grin on his face making it obvious what he was thinking of. She grumbled to herself as she checked her reflection in her phone. She quickly put it on the counter, screen down, not liking what she saw. She looked so hollow, so dead. 

“Don’t get any ideas about this dinner. I’m not gonna let you win over my parents any more than you already have.” Marinette got close to him, pulling him down to her height by his collar. “And don’t you dare think I will ever go back to your little doll after what you did to Lila. I will find the others on my own and I will have Ladybug and Chat Noir rescue them.” The words burned as they left your mouth, already knowing it would be nearly impossible to find all the missing girls. 

Felix knew that. He laughed. “You’re not doing anything without my permission ever again. Not after tonight.” He let the words roll out as if they weren’t a threat, and she tried to proccess it for a minute. It wasn’t a threat. He grabbed her close, pulling out a needle from his pocket. It was a promise. He pushed it into her neck, letting the clearish pink fluid go into her neck. 

“What the f-” Her words were cut short by a pressure on her eyelids. “Felix, what did you do?” Her words were drawn out, and she yawned before slumping over in his arms. 

“Sleep now, Marinette. I’ll see you during dinner.”

 

Marinette woke up in Felix’s room. Her dress was still on, everything was still in place, her shoes even still on. She rolled out of his bed, adjusting her dress, before leaving the room. Adrien was pacing in front of the door, and nearly bumped into her as she left the room. 

 

“Marinette! Thank god you’re okay. I didn’t want to wake you up, because Tikki said you had been-” Adriens words were cut short by Marinette placing her hands on his mouth. 

 

“Shhh. Keep your voice down. Can we talk in your room?” She whispered to him as loud as she could, and he slowly nodded understanding her reasoning but still unsure about the situation. They made their way down the hall, Marinette’s black Louboutin’s clicking against the floor. They were a gift from Adrien, and she wore them every chance she could. They slipped into his room, making sure both doors were locked before Marinette calmed down. Tikki floated out with Plagg, the two more concerned than she had ever seen them. 

 

“Tell me what happened, Marinette.” Adrien said, his voice more serious than usual. 

 

“I told him I didn’t want to be his doll, and that I’d find the girls on my own. And he said something about me not having a choice I think. Or not doing things without him. And he pulled a needle out his pocket with a pink liquid and that was it. I was out. Within seconds I was out.” She felt her neck for a mark, but there was nothing. 

 

“Tikki said she heard him saying something but she wouldn’t say what.” Adrien moved Marinettes hair out the way to check her neck, and the two glanced at Tikki. She looked away for a moment before looking back. 

 

“He was speaking about you. Felix said so many things about you. He kept at it until your parents came back. He knows, Marinette. He’s always known. That’s why he chose you.” She was close to tears, before it clicked in Marinette’s head. Plagg tried to console Tikki, and Adrien just stared at the two. 

 

“Has he been…” Marinette trailed off, and Plagg nodded. 

 

“Chat Blanc.”  

 

Tikki barely whispered it but the word echoed in the room, leaving a chill in the air. 

 

“We have to-” Marinette was completely unphased, not even changing her voice before a kwami cut her off.

 

“You have to do nothing! You have to stop this and let Adrien handle it you idiot! Look what we have. He knows who you are, Marinette! He’s in your head and under your skin. You can’t fight him, not like this, not anymore! You’re in danger and I’ll be damned if I let another Ladybug die for some nobler cause. You’re not doing this anymore!” Plagg shouted at her, each word getting a little louder. Tikki shied away, floating to hide in Marinette’s purse. 

 

“Fine.” She deadpanned, and sighed. “You do you. I’m going home.” 

 

“No, you can’t go home yet. Let me give you your Christmas gift first.” Adrien reached for her hand, feeling awful about his Kwami’s outburst, but she pulled away. 

 

“Just give it to me tomorrow. I can’t handle this right now.” Her voice was monotonous, obviously she was emotionally exhausted.

 

Marinette made her way to the door, unlocking it and swinging it open only to walk into her nightmare. 

 

“I see you’ve spent a little time with my younger brother. I’d like it if you didn’t frighten me like that, I’d worried you’d left and went home. I came to bring you down for dinner.” Felix’s voice was sly, as if he knew she was about to go home. She couldn’t fight him. Not now. She was too done with the day.

 

“Dinner sounds nice.” She sighed, before making her way downstairs to the dining room. She practically tossed herself into her chair, not speaking to anyone as she sat, and rolled her eyes. 

 

Dinner went well, the food was all delicious and no one picked up on the obvious tension between the youth at the table. It was desert that found it all crashing down.

 

Marinette poked at her piece of yule log, the poor pastry only being pecked at. It wasn’t nearly as good as the one her parents made, but she refused to be ungrateful. The chatter picked up, Sabine clearly praising Gabriel for his wonderful children and Tom joking around with Adrien. Felix cleared his throat and the table fell quite. He stood up, the chair scraping against the floor causing Marinette and Adrien to flinch slightly. 

 

“I want to thank you all for coming, it has been a fun christmas evening. I would like to make an announcement. It was a surprise for my family, but at this point we have all grown so close I consider the Dupain-Chengs my family as well.” Felix paused to smile at Sabine and Tom. “In February I will be releasing my own fashion line, under the Agreste name. It will be my first ever fashion line, and is to be marketed towards women. I had drawn from gothic lolita inspirations and- Oh I’m getting off topic. Anyway, I wish to ask something of the family. Sabine, Tom, would you permit me to make your daughter an apprentice under me on my line.”

 

He grinned, smiling down on the family as if he were eating them up. Sabine was a bit perturbed, wheels turning in her head for a moment, before Tom grabbed her hand. She was ripped from her train of thought and into her husband's excited face. 

 

“Of course! She would be happy to, wouldn’t you Marinette. The first big step into the fashion industry!” Tom was beaming with pride and joy all directed to his pride and joy. Sabine also smiled, and nodded. Marinette on the other hand was not paying attention to the conversation at all, as she was picking at her nails, peeling off the skin around the cuticles. 

 

“Wonderful! I have a studio for her to move into where she can work on her designs!” Felix seemed so excited and pure, that Sabine completely forgot about her piecing things together. Everyone returned to celebrating, except for Adrien who was beyond mortified. He heard his heart. The evening winded down, and they moved to the living room to open gifts. Sabine received a new pair of earrings, diamond encrusted gold hoops. Tom received a suit for formal occasions. Marinette got gifts from everyone. A new Laptop from Gabriel, new louboutins from Felix, but she refused to open Adrien’s gift, putting it to the side instead. Everyone said their goodnights and the Dupain-Chengs went home. Marinette made her way to her room to sleep, before remembering Adrien’s gift. She teared up, thinking about how angry she was at him and Plagg earlier, before gently tearing at the wrapping paper. Inside was a delicately hand crafted music box. She wound it up, gently running her finger along the gold trimming before letting go and letting the music play. She opened the panel to reveal the dancers, only to be faced with a porcelain ballerina rendition of ladybug and chat noir, as gentle classical music played. A tear ran down her cheek as she watched the life she wished she had dance around in front of her. The music slowed as it ended, and she shut the box before getting ready for bed. Tomorrow she would hang out with Adrien. Tomorrow she would apologize. 

  
Purple eyes peered through her window. Tomorrow she would belong to them. Tomorrow she would apologize. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Oh boy, this chapter is super late, but I finally did it.   
> Anyway, as always if you have any questions or fanfiction requests message me on tumblr literal-trash-oops.


	8. Nothing

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> TRIGGER WARNING: SELF HARM AND DRUG USE. SKIP TO THE END FOR THE GIST OF WHAT THIS WAS IF YOU'RE JUST DONE WITH THAT ASPECT OF THE STORY.

Marinette woke up to the smell of her parents cooking. The day after Christmas and they had nothing more to do than enjoy what they had. Marinette crawled out of bed, her kwami asleep next to her wonderful gift from Adrien. She was going to make her way downstairs before a question popped into her head. 

If Adrien cared so much about her, why hadn’t he stopped her? Was she that stubborn? No, she could still listen to reason. She nudged her kwami awake, the question gnawing at her subconscious. There had to be something else, something stopping him from taking that extra step she loved him for. She stood in her room completely silent before the winter light pouring into her room became a nuisance. She popped a pill in her mouth and shut her curtains, before descending in her pajamas. She hadn’t realized how long she had just been standing there, before facing the reality that her breakfast had gotten cold and her parents had retreated to their rooms. Was this all that was left for Marinette? A cold welcome on a winter morning. These thoughts had been creeping up on her more and more, the pills dulling her senses but stimulating her body in ways she could explain. She felt whole whenever she took one as if her life was built for the moment when it kicked in. The warm feeling spread from her stomach to the rest of her body, and for a moment she buzzed. 

‘Bees.’

That was all she could think when she buzzed the way she did. Her life was made of bees. But that being put aside, the side effects were more frequent. The cottonmouth, the nausea, the dizziness, the hallucinations. To forget them, she simply took another pill and felt warm and fuzzy again. 

Right, back to her breakfast.

She took another pill, before attempting to microwave her oatmeal. She could barely walk and resolved to eat it cold. 

She woke up an hour later, and took another pill, before making her way to her room. She felt nothing. The warmth wasn’t there. The cold wasn’t there. She wasn’t even completely sure she was there. It was wrong. She was alone again, with just her thoughts. She locked the trapdoor and stumbled to her desk. It wasn’t fair. Why her? She couldn’t take it. Her thoughts swam with her parent’s lack of attentiveness, her long loves lack of a spine and her abuser's lack of remorse. Worst of all, her lack of action. Where was her own spine? Her own backbone. Her own leg to stand on. Was she even worth being called Ladybug if she could barely act like a lady? She was nothing more than the feeling the very pills she loved gave her. Wrong. She was wrong. 

She spun around in her chair to see her reflection. It wasn’t her anymore. Her skin was near translucent. Her neck, littered with love marks from a lover she didn’t permit. She still had the scars from the events, that seemed oh so long ago. Who was she? Where was the girl she once knew? She wasn’t Marinette anymore, and she didn’t deserve to be. 

She faded back in, only to hear her kwami saying something. Another reminder of her failures. She wasn’t worth being Ladybug. She tore off her earrings, Tikki disappearing with them. She threw them in her drawer and slammed it shut. But no matter what she couldn’t hide from her reflection. It wasn’t her. Why was there a stranger staring back at her? She fell to her knees before the mirror and sobbed, not even feeling the relief of the tears she witnessed. She didn’t deserve to anyway. She threw her hands against the mirror, the cold surface not even shocking her senses. She felt nothing as the reflective shards fell to the floor, cutting into her hands. It was better this way. She wasn’t worth being seen. Picking up a singular shard, she did the devils deed, carving into herself as if her arms were made of paper. The moment she felt the weight of what she had just done, staring down at herself, the puddle of blood she had become, she took another pill and cleaned it all up. Wrapping her wounds in bandages, she tossed out the mirror, the last bit of herself, and checked her phone. Felix had messaged her. Something about moving in. She was clueless and took a final pill to alleviate the confusion as she packed up a bag. She was dressed and ready, and as she turned off her bedroom light, she left Marinette behind, accepting once and for all that she was no one.

  
  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> For those of you that skipped, marinette did so many drugs she realized she wasn't herself anymore. Then she moved out. 
> 
> Sorry for the short update. I promise I'm already working on the next chapter. I just got a new laptop. In other news I"m going off to college. If you have any questions about when the next chapter is coming up, just message me on tumblr literal-trash-oops. Those of you that made requests... I'm working on them I'm just very tired. Anyway please be safe and keep reading!


	9. Conflict Resolution

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Tw: Gore mention.

Adrien did not sleep that night. Or any night for the next week. He knocked back redbull after redbull, until he simply could no longer function and passed out crying in the bathroom covered in skittles. It wasn’t that he was having fun, or trying to forget Marinette. He simply opted to give her the space she needed until she could think rationally. But his subconscious gnawed away at his own rational thought, and the sense of unease overwhelmed him. This wasn’t the right thing to do, but it was his only option right now. So when it was six days after christmas, he elected to call Marinette and see if she wanted to hang out. Innocent enough. But his call wasn’t answered initially. He panicked, and called her an additional ten times. On the eleventh call, her phone was answered. But instead of her sweet melodic voice to soothe his worries, he heard heavy breathing and high pitched moaning. A distant slapping noise. Definitely an American television program in the background, probably Family Feud. The moaning got louder, until he heard a much closer slapping noise and it turned to sobbing. The phone was moved to the source of the gruff breathing. 

“Don’t call back.”

The line went dead, and Adrien dropped his phone. 

There were a number of emotions going through his head. There was initially anger and worry. He knew exactly what was going on, and if he had acted sooner he could’ve prevented it but he didn’t. Was she okay? She certainly sounded like she was enjoying herself. But that was the part that frustrated him the most. It was two parts. One, she was enjoying herself at Felix’s hand, and two, he had “enjoyed” himself hearing her. He was quickly embarrassed and filled with shame, but no faster did he become more angry. This was the second time he had done this. He wasn’t a child anymore, he shouldn’t be this weak to something. He was wrong for feeling that way at this time. But the painful erection in his pants said differently. 

It was wrong to feel this way. He wasn’t like his brother. 

Adrien began to cry once again. He didn’t want to be like his brother. He didn’t want to get off on some sick idea of a pretty girl being hurt. But there he was, at 11:48 in the morning, thinking about all the nasty little things he could do to his close friend. He shook them from his mind but they kept coming back. He couldn’t take it, and he decided to resolve his issue. He balled up his fist and punched through the wall.  _ He would not be like his brother _ . The pain shot through his arm, and his knuckles bled.  _ He would be stronger. _ The drywall crumbled as he removed his fist.  _ He would prove that monster wrong. _

“Plagg, Claws Out!”

_ He would save all the girls of Paris, from his brothers danger. Even if it cost him his own sanity.  _

 

In the event that one ever becomes too high to remember who they are, an intervention is usually the best step. But in Marinette Dupain-Chengs case, the next best step, was getting a little bit higher, to forget that the forgot. Marinette had done little to design in her new studio apartment. The last thing she remembered was that her legs were sore, and so were her princess parts.  _ What a juvenile phrase. _ That was her last thought, yet she knew it wasn’t one she would normally think. She wasn’t thinking normally. She was higher than a kite tied to an airplane. She was too aware and she took another pill. Sex. That was all her body could think of. When she went to use the bathroom, she leaked her lover's seed. It was more semen than piss. Of course, she didn’t always use the toilet, but she didn’t like to think about that. All she could think about was Felix. She barely remembered him, but he always gave it to her so good. It felt amazing, but a sense of dread overwhelmed her whenever she thought his name. So she only called him Daddy. He quite liked it, and he liked everything she was being. A perfect little doll for his amusement. He was so close to fully breaking her in. Just a bit longer, and she would be all his. No need for another pill to forget him, she would’ve forgotten everything she used to be before him. Her whole life would be Felix Agreste with guest star This Dick  ™. She was lost to him. It was all over. It was almost good enough for Felix to ignore that Chat Noir had found each and every one of his girls. Almost. Where does that low-rate, wannabe superhero get off taking the Prince of designs sluts. Each time he saw it on the news it made his blood boil. But when Felix looked at what the Miraculous Ladybug had become at his hands, it didn’t matter. Chat could never rescue his princess. She was in another castle. 

“Up for a round five?” He called from the sofa. Marinette dragged herself off the bed and over to the couch, her eyes lidded with lust as she lowered herself onto her masters shaft. “Atta girl. Always pleasing Daddy.” He cooed, before a moan escaped his lips. She was getting better every day. 

 

Adrien knew where Marinette was, but he had to save her for last. She was ladybug, for fucks sake, she could handle herself. Right? It was New Year’s Eve, and he elected to spend it in the hospital with Lila. She pulled through, but was in no condition to do anything except stare into space. Just like Marinette when she was rescued. Just like all the girls. Her heart rate slowed just a touch whenever he spoke. She was at least better than Marinette, at least she was capable of sensing things.  He was there for a full five hours before receiving a text from his father. The New Year’s Party was starting soon, and he needed to return home immediately. It wasn’t much of a home to Adrien anymore. Not with his monster of a brother welcome under that roof. Adrien grabbed his coat, and gave Lila a kiss on the forehead before heading out. No doubt, Chloe would be there, now that she had for the most part recovered. Every one of the girls seemed to recover better than Marinette. But then again, none of them had been through it as bad as her. 

The party started at nine, and all of the high class snobs were there. No shortage of female heirs flirted with Adrien, but each one was met with a disinterested nod, and a rude departure. 

It wasn’t until eleven, that the shit hit the fan. Adrien looked up from his glass of champagne to see Marinette. She was stunning, her hair in an updo, laced with diamonds and rubies throughout. She was in a formfitting black dress, dripping with diamonds in every place possible. Everywhere she moved, she attracted men's attention, making each and every girl jealous. None was more furious than Chloe. Yet, everyone remained cool and collected, save for Adrien who immediately stormed off. To see her on her own would be one thing, but she was latched onto his older brothers arm. He made his way into his room, locking the door behind him. Plagg was feasting on cheese, he didn’t care to bother his kwami anyway. He was just done. He had lost. He heard the guests begin to prepare to count down, a few wanting to be extra and set the timer from ten minutes. He cried for the first three, before his eyes shot open and he got an idea. He had to take his Marinette back. He had to save her. She was all that was left. 

 

“Plagg, Claws out!” Adrien shouted, and the kwami was sucked into his ring from across the room. There was only one place Marinette would leave her earrings. He made his way into her old room, where dust had already collected. It was a mess, glass and blood everywhere. He rifled through her drawers, before setting on the one beneath his gift. Beneath a stack of fabric was her earrings. He would bring her back. 

 

He had five minutes left. 

 

He made his way back home, remaining transformed, as he slipped into the mansion. He entered through his father’s office, before joining the crowd, the high class citizens more than pleased to see a hero amongst them. But where is ladybug they murmured. He had a minute left, and people began to double up. He spotted Marinette. He maneuvered his way through the crowd, careful not to meet his brother's gaze. His brother was spaced out, obviously receiving word from Hawk Moth. Less than twenty seconds. He pried Marinette away from her abuser, slowly bringing her towards the center of the room. With only ten seconds left, he switched out her earrings. 

“Who are you to touch me?” She protested, her words barely able to get over a whisper. 

“Someone who loves you more than you can imagine.” He replied tearing up. 

“FIVE!” The crowd shouted. 

“No one loves me except Felix.” She replied as they hit one.

“I’m sorry.” He cried. “Cataclysm.” 

“HAPPY NEW YEAR!” The crowd cheered, as Marinettes flesh was burnt off, the layers peeling one by one. It hurt. That was what brought her back. It hurt. It burned, the searing pain making each and every one of her nerve endings scream. Felix shouted from across the room, as Marinette became aware of everything that was happening. The crowd turned to face the couple in the center of the room, as the jewel of the party had her skin disintegrated before them. It felt like an eternity of pain, but it had only been a second before Marinette realized what she had to do. 

“Tikki, spots on.” She whispered, as she took her last breath. It was a miracle, what that suit did the minute it wrapped around her body. Her wounds were gone, her high was over, her pains were no more. It felt so right to be Ladybug. She didn’t feel anything but warmth and fuzziness but it was different from the drugs. It was love. She felt the love of her parents, of her partner, and of everyone she had ever saved. The crowd was stunned, unsure what to feel, and Marinette stood proudly as she donned her mask. 

“Felix Agreste, or should I say Chat Blanc. You’re going down big time for what you did to me and those other girls.” Ladybug announced, and the crowd all turned to face Felix. 

“What in the name of god are you talking about. I’ve done nothing.” Adriens transformation wore off, and he fled the room.

“So are you saying that I don’t know what I’ve been through?” She pointed at him, the room going silent. Chloe finally piped up. 

“Or that I don’t recognize my attacker?” 

Everyone's heads turned, to see the Mayor's daughter in tears. “You said if I told anyone, you’d kill me and everyone I ever cared about. You forced me to keep my mouth shut, and you held all my friends captive. What am I supposed to think, attending your father's party as a guest, only to see the man who scarred me.” She fell to the ground. “I can’t even look at myself without seeing what you did written all over my body. How could you do that to another human being? And to deny it in front of a portrait of your own mother? You came from a woman, how could you do that to another woman?” 

There was a murmur throughout the crowd, not knowing who to believe, as a few girls comforted Chloe. 

“This is outrageous. Security, remove these two at once, they obviously have a scheme against me.” 

“Oh, really, big bro? So then what are these doing on your computer?” A projector flickered on, to show a video. It was only 39 seconds long, but more than enough time to reveal the horror that was there. Marinette nearly collapsed watching herself on the screen. There he was, rubbing barbed wire against her womanhood, as she screamed for him to stop. He just continued, a sick grin on his face, as he dug deeper and deeper into the flesh of her inner labia, her clitoris barely recognizable amongst the blood. It was too much for any of the guests, as many immediately sought to attempt to look away, only to face their subject of disdain. Felix looked shocked, trying to play it innocent for a moment, before laughing. Just a snicker at first before it grew into a cackle. Plagg reappeared, the cheese still in his mouth, as he nodded at Adrien. Adrien transformed to offer strength to Marinette, before witnessing a horror. His brother also transformed, into his complete opposite. The feral form of a man beyond reason, the akuma of his family pride, the simple Chat Blanc. The guests knew better than to remain there, fleeing the Agreste Mansion as quickly as possible. But there was no escape from what they knew. And no one was more angry than Sabine Dupain-Cheng, who fought her way through the crowd to try to return to the mansion where her enemy resided.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> We're winding down to the end. Please. Don't hate me if this gets bad. This is the hardest I've ever worked on anything.


	10. The End

Nothing in life is easy. That’s what this fight taught the dynamic duo of Ladybug and Chat Noir. Nothing in life is easy, and the things that are worth it are usually the hardest. 

So why did this battle seem so pointless. They were tired. So tired. Hours of fighting, and Chat Blanc seemed to only have a small scratch on his face. Nothing they tried worked. Monologue after monologue, inspiration after inspiration, they were at a stalemate, but nothing could break the tie. It hurt, to watch the ultimate team be so easily matched. It was pointless. That was then the tides shifted. If the fight was easy to describe, it would be. But with the amount of yo-yoing and jumping that happened, it was a mess. There were countless times where Ladybug accidentally hit Chat Noir, or when Chat Noir crashed into Ladybug. Felix was growing bored. It was time to end this. 

“Look, little brother. A trick I learned from you.” 

Chat Noir turned around but it was too to catch up to his other half. 

“Cataclysm.” The off color, leather clad Chat shouted, as he dug his arm into his younger brothers back. The suit can do many things, such as heal or improve physical capabilities. But it can only stand so much. Ladybug watch in horror as her mortal enemy’s hand stuck out of the love of her life’s chest, his blood dripping to the floor. He removed it, Adrien’s transformation immediately coming off, a severely injured plagg, and now dead Adrien slumping to the ground. Ladybug screamed in horror, and Chat Blanc lunged for her. 

“You’re still mine,  _ bug-a-boo _ .” Chat Blanc mocked, and Ladybug snapped. No, she didn’t fight as if filled with infinite power. She wept, and ran to her love, the only reveal of her new strength in the way that she pushed Felix away. 

“Take my miraculous, Marinette. Win.” He uttered, his last words being inaudible pleas for help. The resolve of a woman is not one to be tested. Marinette, tore the ring off of Adrien's finger, Plagg begging her not to do this. “Claws out.”

 

It would be easier to say that no one made it out alive that day. That the power of the two miraculouses together made it impossible to function, and blew up the entire mansion with everyone inside. Or much like in Avatar the Last Airbender, Marinette went into a mode of power unimaginable, and destroyed her enemy, before resurrecting her love. But it would be a lie, and no one is reading this for lies. 

 

Marinette felt capable of anything. She truly did. She had the power of creation and destruction in her hands, and she felt it more than justified to murder Felix. The poor akumatized man sensed this, and attempted to make a run for it. But Marinette was there before he could sense her. His words from before echoed in her head.  _ “It’s his fault mom is gone.” _ Not long after Chloes words did the same.  _ “You came from a woman, how could you do that to another woman?”  _

Marinette, in her now infinite power, did not kill Felix that day. She did not touch him with any malice or even try to find where the akuma was. No, Marinette pulled her abuser into her arms and hugged him. And in four simple words, she ended him. “It’s not your fault.”

“W-what? I raped you and murdered your classmate. I did so much evil, it’s all my fault.” Felix said, unsure what she was trying to pull. 

“No, Felix. Listen to me. It’s NOT your fault. Or anyone's for that matter. Don’t blame Adrien. Don’t beat yourself up. Don’t blame you father. You know she loved you. She loved her family. It isn’t your fault.” 

The leather bubbled, as the akuma risked giving away. 

“But, we made her leave.” He replied, and Marinette shook her head no. 

“If you made her leave, you would’ve known immediately. It was her choice. It’s not your fault.” Instinctively, he touched the ring on his hand, lovingly. 

“It’s not my fault?” He teared up, and Marinette ripped the ring off of his hand, breaking it. The akuma fluttered out, and the did her business accordingly, as her abuser laid on the floor, unable to continue. Saying her signature catchphrase, she returned all to normal, bringing her love back to life in that instant. A moment passed, as the crime fighting pair caught up, until a gunshot was heard. They jumped, to see Sabine, standing over the now injured Felix Agreste, tears in her eyes. Marinette stared at her mother, unable to speak words of compassion. Unable to beg her mother to forgive him. It was only the godly power that briefly flowed through her that allowed her to forgive him. The second bullet went through his skull, and Marinette fell to her knees, her mother dropping the gun and running to her daughter's aid. It was too much too quick. Marinette only heard faint things as her eyes shut, her body unable to continue. 

 

Marinette woke up in the hospital, Adrien in the hospital bed right next to her. She cracked a weak smile, and turned to face her friend. 

“I guess that’s what happens when you Cataclysm someone.” She joked, and Adrien's heart rate spiked. He turned to face Marinette, before grinning and playing it cool. 

“Yeah, what a cat-astrophy.”

“Why am I your friend again?” 

The two laughed, before growing quiet. 

“Adrien?” Marinette called out, not wanting to face him. 

“Yeah?” He responded not facing her either. 

“Your brother is dead.”

“I know.” 

“How does it make you feel?” She turned to face him.

“Honestly, it’s bittersweet. On one end, he was a maniac and a serial rapist. But on the other, he was family and the last thing I had to remember mom by. He is so much like her.” Adrien stared at the ceiling. 

“What do you mean he’s like her?” She became a bit afraid before Adrien chuckled. 

“He always blames himself because it hurts too much to not have anything to blame. He was akumatized for so long and I didn’t even realize it. It must’ve been eating at him for a while.” 

“You’ll never become an akuma right?” She asked, now looking at the ceiling too. 

“I won’t as long as you don’t, bug-a-boo.”

They grew silent for a minute.

“Adrien.”

“Yeah, Marinette?”

“I love you.”

Adrien was completely silent, before he weakly got out of his bed and made his way over to Marinette. He leaned in, and kissed her gently on the lips before crawling into her bed and holding her. 

“I love you too. I promise I’ll never let go.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm sorry if this was bad, please do not hate me.


	11. Epilogue

The city rejoiced as their heroes regained their health, all of Paris now knowing their saviours' true identities. Nothing felt better to Marinette than seeing her parent’s proud faces. It took a while for them to warm up to Adrien again after the incident, but when it happened, they were quickly engaged. Everyone personally thanked Marinette and Adrien, from strangers to even Chloe and Lila. Marinette’s sacrifice to the town was duly noted, but it was impossible to find an impartial jury for the trial. Of course, they weren’t trying Sabine, but Gabriel Agreste himself, as he was quickly outed as being hawk moth, the one truly behind all of the horrible deeds. It hurt Adrien to see his father go, but everyone agreed it was for the best. They still attended school as if nothing had ever happened, but everything was forever different. Marinette still had Adrien though, and that was all that mattered. He never let go, and she never let him.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm going to be working on the other two fics I have up, as well as some requests and some more light hearted stuff. I really hope you enjoyed, please give me feed back. Who knows maybe I'll re-do this and make it better.


End file.
